Lovelies from lovelies: https://imgur.com/gallery/UYA3RPN
u/MikePenPal6 Thank you so much for your beautiful offer of sending belated valentines - I felt really special to receive this homemade, heartwarming wish of love & good tidings! Love it all - the heart-themed scrapbooking paper, the “You are my favorite” 3D heart embellishment, the red sequins you used to jazz up the cover (love this craft tip!), the pretty pink cardstock base, your angel & animal themed stickers, & the lovely floral/V-Day washi decorations inside! To answer your question about my V-Day…honestly it was a little sad. I’m lucky to have the most wonderful bf, but he has a chronic illness so we were unable to spend time with each other. So that’s why I was especially excited & appreciative of your kind offer. Your card made me so happy, thank you! Like you, I really “love all the cute things for the holiday”. I just lose my mind over the pairs-themed cuties that emerge around that that day!!!
Like the peanut buttejelly, bacon/egg, cheese/cracker stuffed honeys holding hands:
https://hip2save.com/deals/spritz-valentines-day/
I wish I weren’t lured in by these lovelies, but I’m sappy/stupid that way. Thank you again for brightening my spirits with your sweet card. I hope you had a beautiful V-Day & that all your days are filled with limitless love! =)
u/mnjohn x 4 WOW!!!! Thank you so much for the super thoughtful, ***surprise*** birthday card party (you sent me a party, what!??!) with all your lovely wishes & wonderful goodies!!!! The illustrated animal postcards - toooo cute!!! I also appreciated the affirmation mini card encouraging me to “Remember why you started” & the affirmation postcard - this is such a valuable affirmation for anyone, at any stage in life: “I think it’s okay to not have everything figured out by now.” TRUTH! I was astonished at your generous gift of unused vintage/modern stamps - thank you! Thank you also for the unique washi samples (the mail themed ones…so sweet), fun stickers, scrapbooking ephemera, & goodies to pass on. My heart was so happy to experience all your kindnesses. My heart felt full - and I felt spoiled. I just thought of how lucky your loved ones/friends who have had the pleasure of meeting you IRL must feel - because if you’re so loving to a mere stranger…how loving are you to everyone else?!?!? I also loved the “Art of Magic” forever stamp you used (never seen this beauty or the other neato women cryptologists stamp before!!!!), your lovely calligraphy of my name on the envelope, the floral stickecake decorations, and your personalized stamp (what a beautiful illustration of you)! So so neat! Thank you also for the MARVELOUS “Hello” mailbox-themed postcard that you personally designed - it’s such a treat! The vintage style for the graphics is so fun! I’m especially bananas for anything mail-themed since I’m new to snail mail as of this year. So I felt really lucky to receive mail-themed magic! Thank you for making me feel so special with your thoughtful, generous gifts, delightful wishes, & all the love & affection. Wishing you infinite joy with your creative dreams & endeavors!
u/germymany Thank you for the vintage 1840 floral-illustrated postcard! I love the nature scene themed pink & green washi tape! The smiling matchsticks - sooo cute! Wishing you the best of walks on the most beautiful beaches!
u/melhen16 x 2 Thank you for the postcard thanking me for the “overloaded dog postcard” & the patriotic-themed card for National Card Writing Month! Thank you for the cheerful, colorful stickers to pass on! Hope you had a blast writing cards & spreading cheer!
u/yetanotherblankface Thank you for the insanely cute Pusheen postcard decorated with the matching, insanely cute Pusheen stickers! The pretty pastel colors instantly brightened my day! Wishing you pretty pastel days!
u/FeistyBlizzard THANK YOU for making me go bananas/bonkers/looney tunes for the gorgeous illustrated NPR postcard!!! It made me so happy in so many ways. Not only am I an NPR nerd, but I also flip out over illustrated cards/doodles! The graphics on it - so insanely cuuuute! The colors of the graphics instantly happied (the way this card made me feel made me use this word for the first time ever haha) the heck out of my day! And I’m also a sucker for mini illustrations - the mini cup of ice cream, the mini bottles of nail polish, & the mini notebook papeenvelope/pencil just had me swooning! I have to bug you & ask if the postcard is part of a series/how I can find more like it. Because I love it that much! NPR? A brief search was fruitless. AND where can I find the precious mail-box/letter themed sticker?!?! Soooo cute! Even the pretty pastel washi is a joy to look at - you’ve got great taste!!! I also wish I had your delicate, elegant handwriting - it’s like a blend of calligraphy & modern art!!! You asked about my fave things - like you, I love to read. And I’m particularly obsessed with libraries, bookstores, ephemera, junk journaling, & newly nuts for snail mail through RaOC. Thanks again for this postcard treat! Wishing you all of your fave things in all your fave colors!!
u/somedrawer Thank you for the pretty pink & yellow pastel themed birthday postcard! The pattern is so simple yet so bright & happy! Your sweet wishes were so heartfelt & happy - your enthusiasm means so much to me! I also loved how you wrote HB in two different colors of ink - what a cool 3D effect! I can’t wait to try that sometime. I also love your whimsical, pretty cursive script. The smiley face you drew - so cute. Also love the spring-y, bright washi & strawberry sticker!!! Thank you for thinking of me with your kindness! Wishing that you discover lots of mysterious goodies in not only somedrawer, but every drawer in your home (but not in a creepy way - I’m sorry, I haven’t been sleeping well). ;)
u/SailorCrush Thank you for making my day with the most beautiful hand-illustrated, happy doodles ever on the beautiful glittering hearts birthday card!!! I wish I could draw & illustrate like you! All of the doodles - the cuuuute unicorn with that awesome braid…tooooo cute, the slumbering, smiling moon, the floating balloons, the 3D heart, the multifaceted gem, the mini globe (the intricate detail work is soooo nice), the star, and I don’t know if it’s a comet or constellation or what but it’s precious, the doodles border (love this tip for instant creativity - even a dodo like me could do this, yessss!) - all of it is such a treat! Oh my these elegant stickers - so beautiful!!!! Thank you so much for spending all your time & effort making my birthday so special! I hope your summer is as sweet as you’ve been to me, my friend.
u/Rura_Penthe924 Thank you for the beautiful postcard depiction of the Sagittarius Dwarf Irregular Galaxy with your warm, wonderful birthday wishes! I loved your wishes for “new adventures & opportunities” - these wishes & your kindness in thinking of me made my birthday special! I also love your pretty print handwriting. I could read the most boring of books if they were written in your handwriting!!! Thanks again. Wishing you a beautiful summer!
u/OkayFlan x 2 When will you cease to be cute? Good Lord, these stickers of the soda cans, tea cups, decadent desserts, kawaii cutie bears, the baby bird, mocktails, your mini OkayFlan personalized salmon pink/white stickers on the “Don’t Overthink It” postcard (so needed this message) are soooooo insanely cute my heart hurts! What you did with the torn-paper address label - that’s soooo neat!!!! I’m also nutty for the “Boston Tea Party” stamp you used - never seen it before!! Thank you for thinking of me, my always-encouraging, always-there friend!!!! AND WHAT?!?! The rainbow surprise card with the generous gift of Korean Stickers made my heart burst with joy that you thought of me!!!! The way you decorated the envelope with all the bright, beautiful cute-themed pastry/kawaii stickers & washi tape made me so happy. You took so much time & effort in jazzing up the envelope with so many happy vibes - I felt really special. Thank you!!!!! I can’t even begin to thank you for all the special birthday goodies you sent me as the library is about to close (update - they’re now closed & I’m typing outside in 101 degree weather connected to my mobile hotspot because I’ve been having a thank you formatting crisis for hours waaaaa - ever have issues?!?) so I’ll thank you in another post. So blessed to be your friend. XOXO
u/rennbrig x 2 Apologies I have to post your ty in the comments, been in tech pain for hours

Does anyone know how to get out of a Starbucks contract?
I just started my new job and I already want to quit. I REALLY want to quit. Because this shit isn’t normal. I mean, is it? Do you guys have experience with this type of shit, or is it a normal thing when moving to the city? I’m a small-town girl so I’m not used to this. We didn’t even have a Starbucks. Just a diner that had been broken into multiple times over the years.
Do you know the bad feeling you get when something bad is going to happen, but you ignore it for the sake of staying sane? .Yeah.
It was one of those situations.
But I needed cash. I needed a job. College in the city is expensive, especially in my mid-twenties. Uber Eats every night and various subscriptions, such as Netflix and Spotify—as well as basic living needs required cash. So, naturally, I looked for part-time jobs I could use to fill up my weekend and nights. When it came to job hunting, I was fairly lazy. So, the Starbucks job kinda came out of nowhere.
I wasn’t even looking for it. I was applying for a job in the local music store when it caught my eye. Someone to work late evenings and nights on weekdays and Saturdays. The job description didn’t say much, just basic pay details and a full paragraph dedicated to talking about “The Starbucks Family”. Skim reading it, I skipped to the APPLY NOW button and sent in my resume via email. Two hours.
It had taken two hours to get an email back offering a video interview the next day—and a guaranteed job if I didn’t screw it up. The video interview went well to my surprise. The woman who conducted it acted more like a friend, asking me what my favorite movies and TV shows were, and then going into detail about her own.
It didn’t even feel like an interview. More like a chat. Which was exactly what the email said it was going to be. The interviewer was my mom’s age, a total mom-like persona. She offered me iced tea before laughing and realizing we were on a video call. Her cat popped up halfway through her introducing several staff members by name. A large tabby whom she picked up and hugged to her chest. I wasn’t sure what to do except repeatedly say, “Aww.” and force an even bigger smile.
The woman who for some reason did not introduce herself finished the interview with a more formal and thorough talk-through of rules and regulations. Which went in one ear and out the other. I think I was too excited about the job as a whole. There’s something almost mythical about working at Starbucks. I’ve seen barista TikTok complaining about customer service and harping about in the back rooms. It looked fun. Plus, free drinks? I figured working at the famous coffee chain would at least have benefits and freebies.
The woman spoke to me for almost two hours about certain drinks, telling me I would be trained up, and then going on to explain the dos and don’ts in a working environment. It was kind of patronizing, but I figured she had to be to remain professional. I tuned out when she started talking about a certain “feud” they had with another store down the road. The woman didn’t go into detail, but her expression did darken significantly when she leaned closer to her screen and repeated the phrase, “Do you understand me?” I had to backtrack and try and go over what she had been saying, but I had found myself mesmerized by the gilded sword in the background. It hung from the back wall in all of its glory, and I was having a hard time trying to figure out why exactly a Starbucks manager had a sword hanging from her wall.
“Sim?” Inclining her head, the manager cleared her throat. “Did you hear me?”
I did. Sort of. Under no circumstances must I visit or go near 2nd Street Starbucks. If I did there would be dire consequences and I would face losing my job, or worse.
I wasn’t sure what “or worse” was, but from the way her expression twisted from funny-cat-lady to a potential employer, I didn’t want to ask.
Yikes.
“Uh, yeah,” I said. “I can’t go near the 2nd Street store.” I almost choked on a glass of water I had been slowly sipping throughout the interview. I had been sweating most of the day, dying in the intense June heat. It was a lot cooler in the evening in the city, but I was used to draining at least ten glasses a day. “Is that real?” I couldn’t help asking, pointing to the sword behind her.
I know you are supposed to maintain a certain professional persona and façade during professional work interviews with potential managers. However, I really wanted to know if that ancient thing was real, it was driving me crazy. Because questions were arising in my head: How did she get it? Was it hers? Was it for some kind of aesthetic and feng-shui, or was there more to it? From the look on the interviewer’s face, she seemed startled.
Whipping her head around, her strict grey ponytail hitting the screen, she nodded before turning back to me, her gaze flicking down to what I presumed was a script she was reading off—or maybe she was skimming through my printed-out resume. I wanted to ask her more about the elephant in the room, but she seemed satisfied with answering my question with a nod. She asked me more questions, mostly about my work ethic and if I enjoyed working in a team and independently, if I had any special requirements, and oddly—if I had ever held a firearm. Now, that caused alarm bells. Along with the gilded sword dangling from this forty-something-year-old’s lounge wall, I was definitely starting to question the exact nature of what I would be doing at this job. Serving coffee was an obvious one, though I was pretty sure Starbucks barista's didn’t require military-style training.
When I didn’t know what to say, she seemed to back-pedal. “Oh, it’s in case of a robbery.” She said. But her expression stayed stoic. Speaking in the tone of being joking, but not being joking. “It is rare. However, it is a precaution we must take.” Choosing her words carefully, the interviewer steepled her hands in front of her face, leaning her chin on her fingers. “Our employees are given basic fire-arm training in the instance that one day we may face a difficult situation. Now, I am not saying it is inevitable, but due to certain behavior throughout the years, it is, of course, better to be safe than sorry.”
“Oh.” I tried to smile. “No, I haven’t,” I paused, hoping my lack of ability to hold a gun wouldn’t screw up my chances. “But I can learn?”
I said it like a question because it was a question. I was questioning myself why exactly I would take up my time learning to shoot a gun I most likely never would need. To my surprise though, the woman’s smile brightened and she looked down at whatever she was writing.
“Of course,” she said. “Sim, I am very happy to hear that. We love employees who do their best to learn and thrive in our working environment,” she paused and typed something on her laptop before her gaze found mine. “I’ll put you down for lessons on Friday mornings. How does that sound?” Before I could answer her—because I was starting to seriously question why she was so obsessed with training me to use a goddamn gun—she was nodding to herself. “I will put Jude in charge of you. I think he is working on Friday, so your induction and welcome can be completed in the morning…”
She trailed off into her own murmured conversation to herself before clearing her throat. I jumped. I didn’t mean to jump, but her whole presence was putting me on edge. The lady had been nicer on the phone, and earlier on in the interview when she was grilling me on which Frozen character was my favorite.
“Okay!” The interviewer gathered up her paperwork, beaming at me through the camera. “Can you start tomorrow? Let’s say…” her eyebrows furrowed together. “5:30? I will not be there for the first hour due to certain obligations,” she traced her lip with the tip of her index. “However, I have four employees working the front desk, I’m sure they will give you a warm welcome.” I noticed something twitch on her lips. It was almost like she was trying to stop herself from laughing—which was childish from a standpoint where I was the younger one, while she was the senior. She was supposed to be setting some kind of standard, and yet for some reason was more inclined in teasing me about workplace friendships, and apparently how “close” my colleagues were. I wasn’t stupid, I knew what friendship was like in the workplace. It’s not “real” because you’re all there to do a job, not making lifelong friendships.
“I’m looking forward to meeting them,” I said when she snorted out a laugh that twisted up my gut.
"Absolutely," she responded. "The team is very close, so don't take it personally if they're initially cautious. I'm confident that you'll all become great friends! Kai is a kind-hearted sweetheart, while Ana may seem standoffish initially, but she'll warm up to you once you get to know her. Jude, on the other hand, will be your guide during the orientation, so it's best to stay close to him. In fact, it's recommended to shadow him during your first few hours since he's our top performer! Frankly, Sim, I can hardly wait for you to meet them! They're a great group!" This woman seemed to suddenly discover the use of expletives, or maybe she had noticed I visibly wanted to crawl into the ground. The way she was describing the other employees, I was expecting cartoon characters when I walked through the door.
“Right,” I said. I was starting to regret applying. “I’ll be there.”
She ended the call with a bright smile, and her stupid cat walking on the keyboard, causing her to squeak out in horror. I shut my laptop, my cheeks burning. Well, that went…? Well? Could I really say it went well when the manager had spent the last five minutes implying my work colleagues were going to hate me? Fuck.
I didn’t want to go. I trashed my application and deleted her number from my phone. But the morning after, however, I came to the quick realization through precious morning caffeine, that I needed cash. So, no matter how much I didn’t want to go—I had to. So, I headed to classes and tried not to think about it. It was 5:34 when I stepped into the familiar glow of the famous store—not before being stopped in the middle of a crowed by a girl wearing bright pink ray-bans and a scowl. “Do you work there?” she turned and pointed to the store.
I shrugged. “I guess.”
She scoffed, slipping off her ray-bans and fixing me with a bitchy smile. “Your funeral.”
Normally, in situations when strangers say odd things to me on the street, I just laugh it off. But this? This seemed personal.
“What?”
The girl didn’t say anything before turning and walking or rather running away.
Well, that was weird.
After that encounter, I was weighing the positives and negatives of taking up the job. The positives would be cash and something to occupy my mind away from classes, and the negatives were being stuck with insufferable colleagues and a manager who was the embodiment of unprofessional. The store was pretty empty when I stepped through automatic doors, reveling in the cooling fan blasting icy cold air in my face. A dark-haired college girl had her back to me, cleaning tables. But I noticed her stiffening up when I took a step forward. She straightened up like a cat going into territorial mode, before relaxing and holding a two-fingered hand up.
The store was empty so I had no idea who she was signaling to. It wasn’t a greeting to me—I had no idea what it was. I was halfway to the counter before a guy popped up out of nowhere, mid-way through drying a cup with a washrag. His hair was the first thing I noticed. Bright red.
In contrast to his pasty skin, this guy would definitely stand out in a crowd. He was my age or maybe a little older, mid twenties, with a wide smile and not much of anything else, kitted in a short-sleeved shirt, and a Starbucks apron over the top.
I expected quirky cartoon-like weirdos and I got an average Joe. I wasn’t complaining.
Initially, I thought this guy was just another jock-like college guy. But looking closer, the friendliness in his eyes wasn’t sincere, and his smile was strained. Keeping up a professional attitude, he regarded me with a smile, leaning across the counter. But his eyes kept flicking to the door in quick succession like he was waiting for a certain someone to come in. “You.” He pointed at me, trailing his finger to the door, swiping hair from his face with his hand. The guy was bouncing on the heels of his toes, I noticed. He couldn’t stand still, like a hyperactive child. “You’re Sim, The newbie I’m supposed to be training.”
I nodded, offering a nervous wave.
“Jude.” He introduced himself, though clearly distracted, his gaze flicking to and from the door. His facade was friendly enough, but very fake. It was the same smile I presumed he flashed at customers who complimented his looks. “Hey, Sim.”
Instead of holding out his hand for me to shake, he folded his arms across his chest. Jude cocked his head, drinking me in before his lips broke out into a beam.
"Shall we get started?"
Jude started the tour, showing me the store itself, then the back, the storage room, the staff room, and bizarrely, a wooden door which he referred to as, “The Drink”. I had no idea what that meant, but I made a mental note to steer away from it.
The backrooms of the store turned into a labyrinth. The place was covered in mold, peeling paint on the doors and old rugged floor tiles. Jude spoke way too fast like he was intentionally trying to confuse me. By the time I was struggling with my apron, he was turning on his heels with a brow raised. “Your hair is too long so you need to tie it up. You can shadow me this evening but don’t get in my way. We have two twenty-minute breaks and during them, we are contractually obligated to go down to the Second Street store and throw eggs at their windows—ooh, and the girl you just met who didn’t say a word? That’s Ana. You will get used to her.” His smile reached a level of fake I didn’t think was possible. “Why don’t you follow me?”
“What?” I managed to hiss out when Jude was leading me down a long, winding corridor that dipped into various rooms, out-of-order elevators, and the creepiest set of stairs I had ever seen leading into the pitch dark. I was still trying to register his words.
Jude twisted around with a frown. “What’s up?” He nodded at a passing blonde girl who shot me a smile, and hive-fived Jude before disappearing through a door.
“You throw eggs at the store down the road?”
The guy’s lip twitched into the start of a smile. He turned around, quickening his pace. “Did I say that? Obviously, I was joking.”
I stumbled after him, knocking into a dark-haired younger guy carrying a tray of cupcakes. He and Jude seemed to exchange words without speaking before Jude gestured to the stranger. Somehow, I figured out their telepathic conversation through eye movements and strained smiles, they weren’t talking about me. “That’s Kai,” Jude said, pushing through the doors back to the main storefront. He took a customer’s order, retaining that stupid smile. “If you need any help with making those annoying TikTok drinks that take a millennia to make and have probably broken several Geneva convention rules?” He playfully knocked into me while preparing a drink, his hands knowing where everything was, preparing and serving a latte in a matter of minutes, “Kai is your guy! He runs our social media page and is practically a connoisseur on the next big trend. He'll deal with zoomers."
I was slowly starting to ease my way into this job, and my colleagues seemed pretty cool. Jude actually helped me all the way through the evening, introducing his home life and how he grew up as he cleaned tables and conversed with the others—always throwing me into their chatting so I didn’t get left out. I ended up sorting through cookies and making price labels with Aurora, the perky blonde who high-fived Jude earlier. She spoke to me like we had been best friends for years, and that part of her charm made me instantly adore her. She was tiny for her age, but a menace when it came to her sharp tongue and language. I didn’t think a tiny thing like her could swear like a goddamn sailor, but it was cute. Jude and Aurora had a sibling-type thing going on, though every time I caught Kai’s eye, he was smirking. It seemed everyone knew they had a thing except them.
I was actually having fun with the others, bobbing my head to the radio while serving a group of kids, when Jude, who was next to me, seemed to go rigid all of a sudden. His laughing smile carved into something else. I had never seen an expression change so fast.
But he wasn’t the only one. Aurora, cleaning tables and giggling at Jude’s joke, straightened up, her eyes flashing to the door. Kai’s head snapped up from where he had been grinding coffee. Following their gaze, I found myself face-to-face with the manager who interviewed me. But unlike the night before, she was not smiling. The woman dropped her bag at the door before marching towards the counter. Jude leaned over; his expression apprehensive.
“Well?”
His eyes as well as his tone had darkened significantly. All of my colleagues had taken off these masks, these facades of joking smiles and bright eyes, and now I was seeing a glimmer of what they were hiding. What Jude had been looking for all evening, sneaking glances at the door. I watched his gaze follow the manager as she paced back and forth, chewing her nails. “Where is he?”
“I don’t know.” She finally said, lifting her head. Her lips were twisted. “But.” She said, spitting each word, as she rounded the counter, helping herself to coffee. “You’re going to pay a visit to them right now, and…and sort this out once and for all.” Her voice resembled that of a mother talking to her children. She was assertive to them, her eyes piercing. Do you understand me?” The woman nodded at Jude. “You can go.” Her eyes found mine. “Take the new girl, she needs to be inducted.” Finally, she turned to Ana, who was standing in the corner silently. “You are too. I need brains, and Jude is just brawn. Keep him on his toes, young lady."
With a hint of sarcasm in his tone, Jude uttered a brief "Thanks," and then proceeded to take a coffee cup and a Sharpie. Swiftly, he scrawled some words on the side of the cup, before placing it inside a bag and plonking it in front of me. As Jude reached for his coat at the back, he put it on over his green Starbucks apron, creating a striking contrast with his denim blue sherpa. With his mop of red curls, this guy was in no way going to be as incognito as he thought. "We'll manage the conversation,” he said hurriedly, visibly excited. Jude seemed to lead the others in their expressions, his confidence and wit causing them to brighten up, adapting wide smiles. He shoved his hands in his pockets, “All you gotta do is hand them this, okay?”
“Is that a good…” Kai drifted off on whatever he was about to say, ducking his head when Jude shot him a glare.
“I think it’s a perfect idea!” The manager beamed at me. “What a way to fully bring you into our family!”
I took the coffee cup (the empty coffee cup) hesitantly. “What is it?”
“It’s a gift!” Jude said, moving towards the door in long strides. It was all too noticeable that this guy was practically vibrating with an energy I had never known. It was almost manic. “I want to let them know we appreciate them! Y’know! Rival to rival.”
Kai stepped in front of him on the way out.
“Be careful,” he said in a low hum. Aurora joined him, but she wasn’t speaking, her left-hand tugging at the waistband of her jeans. “Keep your head down when you go in because they’ll be expecting you—and they’ll be expecting a retaliation.”
“Relaaaaax, it’s Cora! We used to date!” he cocked his head. "I think."
“I mean it. "
Jude’s gaze found mine for a moment before his smile grew. “Well, we have enough eggs don’t we?” He grabbed my arm, pulling me along. Ana was already gone. I could see her figure already slinking down the street, bleeding into the shadow.
When the two of us hit the cool night air and Jude quickened his pace into a power-walk, his eyes set forwards, jaw set, I figured I should ask what his deal was. If this guy was serious about vandalizing a rival Starbucks, and not just that, urged by his manager, then I had to say something.
The thought of ending up in jail being petty over a rival store made me feel nauseous.
“So, what is this about?” I asked, catapulting myself into a half-run to keep up with him. The guy had abnormally long legs, so he was halfway across the sidewalk while I was barely two steps in front. “Aren’t you taking this a little too seriously?”
Jude didn’t reply, instead remarking on the sky being filled with stars.
“Hey, Ana!” He shouted. “Wait up!”
Second Street Starbucks was like walking into a palace. I could tell why these guys were rivals. The place was a three-floored beast, a glass building made up of a Starbucks downstairs, a library, and a private apartment. I found myself mesmerized by the twinkling lights on the door, the mini water fountain through large windows showing an even bigger storefront with rich-looking wooden tables and reclining chairs. The store was closing. When we stepped in front of the door, there was a sign which clearly said CLOSED on the front.
Still, though, Ana pushed her way through it, followed by Jude, pulling me along with him. Two employees were working, a guy with short blondish hair mopping the floors, and a girl standing at the counter, going through the register. The moment we stepped inside, the guy cleaning up stopped mopping from side to side, his fingers visibly tightening around the mop handle. “Hey there!”
With one of his best fake smiles, Jude raised his arms in surrender. “We’re from the Starbucks down the road. We come in peace, don’t worry!” He gestured to me.
“Can we talk to your manager?”
He took a step, his lip twitching, eyes glinting, which caused a stir in the air. The girl at the counter stopped flicking through a wad of cash in her hand and delicately put it down, and the guy turned to face us with wary eyes.
As Jude took another stride forward, his movements resembled a dance, and I noticed he was having fun teasing them. His eyes sparkled with a childlike glee that was unexpected for a person in his twenties. "Would you like to try our latest coffee recipe? It's like sipping on liquid sunshine." He nonchalantly brushed his jeans, and I half-expected him to pull out an egg. “But…” Jude took another step, and Ana situated herself behind the blonde boy, her expression blank. “You’ve already tasted it, haven’t you?”
The girl behind the counter finally stopped counting cash, delicately placing a wad back inside the register before leaning forward, an amused smirk curving on her lips. “Jude.” Her voice was a low murmur. “I didn’t think I would see you here so soon.”
“Cora.” Jude’s lips quirked. “Trust me, I don’t want to be. But hey, it's the boss's orders.”
She inclined her head, her eyes drinking all of him in. The girl rested her fist on her chin. She was surveying him like a piece of meat. “And you obey her?”
His grin widened, and I saw his hand once again brush the front of his apron. “Like a dog.”
“You know her?” I hissed out, grasping hold of the coffee cup in my hand.
“Cora?” Jude turned to me. “Oh yeah, we used to be the Romeo and Juliet of coffee shop rivalry — back when we were both newbies, and our store kidnapped me as a last resort. To keep the peace, I stayed.” He shrugged. “That’s what I’m told, anyway.”
Starbucks lore was getting dark.
These guys had to be joking around.
I took a step back, eager to head towards the door and be as far away as possible from what I was pretty sure was going to be a lot of eggs, and several arrests. “You worked here?” I couldn’t believe my mouth was still moving and forming words as I took slow steps back. Before Jude caught my arm.
“Apparently.” He said, dragging me back by his side. “Why don’t you give ‘em’ their gift?”
Fuck.
Unwrapping the bag and pulling out the cup, I nodded and took slow strides toward the counter, placing it down in front of her.
Cora frowned, before picking it up, her gaze going to the side.
“Go fuck yourself 2nd street bloodsuckers.” She read out loud, her brow raising into her hairline.
Shit.
“I should probably go.” I managed to say, backing away. “I don’t think is the job for me—”
The latter half of my words exploded in my head when something slammed into my ears, a physical force sending me to my knees. Initially, I didn’t know what it was. It sounded like a nuclear bomb had gone off. When the ringing in my head subsided, I was aware I had my head buried in my knees, my hands clamped over my ears.
But when I tried to listen past the relentless shrill ringing in my skull, I heard them one after the other. Pop, pop, pop! Gunshots. The crack of each bullet ricocheted in my skull. It was a robbery, I thought dizzily. We were being robbed. No, Second Street was being robbed. When I lifted my head to try and find Jude and Ana to see if they were okay-- I expected them to be cowering like me, Jude, under the table, muffling yelling into his hand, and Ana, calmly pulling him to safety. But that wasn't what I saw. Instead, I must have been fucking imagining things. Jude had not moved from his spot-- and perfectly melded into his hand, was a gun. A gun he was holding like a pro, his hands wrapped around the butt, index teasing the trigger.
His trajectory was directly between Cora's eyes. Jude had not been the one who shot the gun. In fact, neither had Ana, who was still standing stiffly behind the blonde guy.
It was a girl behind the counter who had come out of nowhere wielding the type of gun I expected to see in movies. I noticed from his stance Jude had maybe stepped to the left and then the right to avoid being hit, but the way his demeanour was fully and completely relaxed sent shivers creeping down my spine. "The deal is off, Cora," he murmured. "You fuck with us, so we fuck with you." he lowered his gun slightly, his eyes darkening. "Where's Ren? He came here to sniff you out, so where is he?"
Cora seemed remarkably calm. She started to raise her hands, her lips forming the words, "I don't know what you're talking about" before she stopped, her body going limp. It took me a disorienting moment to realize Jude had taken the shot, followed by another, both landing right between her eyes. When Cora hit the ground, the whole world around me exploded.
I was dragged to the ground by Jude, as he dived across the floor, pressing himself into the back of a table, twisting around, and taking out the barista who almost shot me in the face. There were five of them, all of them good shooters. Too good. Ana easily took out a blonde and brunette with her own magnum, followed by a bald guy who crashed through the counter which collapsed under him.
Jude fell into a manic shoot-out with a guy who would not give up, and after several attempts, re-loading, and attempting to finish him from the ground, my colleague got tired and stood up, dropped his gun, and leaped across the counter. I didn't know what to watch. Ana, who was destroying their coffee machine, or Jude, who snapped the boy's neck with a single twist of his fingers, before ripping out his eyes. He hauled the dead guy over his knees, grazing his teeth across the pasty flesh of the boy's neck, his eyes flickering. I wouldn’t say they turned a different color, but there was something inhuman about them, a certain tint around his iris. "Urgh."
He shoved the corpse away, jumping up. "He reeks of it." Treading through broken glass and pooling red on the floor, my colleague grabbed a cup, downed it, and then spat it out. “That.” He sputtered. “Is the worst fucking thing I’ve ever tasted.”
Ana stepped in front of him, handing the boy his gun. “When one of any clan is murdered for with no reason, there is an imbalance, and the coffee is tainted. We must restore the balance before this gets out of hand,” she surprised me by speaking, with a tinge of an Aussie accent. The girl side-eyed me before shooting Jude a knowing look. “Don’t let her get in our way.”
“Aye, aye, captain.” He mocked a salute before nodding to me. “All right! Sim, you grab a sample. We’ll go find the altar.”
Something ice-cold slipped down my spine.
“What?”
“Cool it. It’s more fun than it sounds,” was all Jude responded with. “Grab the samples.”
I was running on adrenaline, doing exactly what he said. I grabbed two coffee cups. “What do we do now? We go home, right?”
He swiped at his lips with a sound of disgust. “Are you kidding? No, man. We get coffee which ain’t tainted.”
Ana took out two guards in the back before leading us both through a heavy metal door that led into tunnels, tunnels, illuminated by candlelight. “You just killed multiple people,” I finally managed to choke out, following the two of them deeper into the dark. “Over coffee.” I couldn’t resist a nervous laugh that spluttered into a cry. “You just murdered seven baristas over fucking coffee!” I found myself backing away at points, scanning for a way out, an exit away from this fucking nightmare.
Jude turned to me, the glitter in his eyes reflected in the candlelight. “Oh, please,” His voice echoed down the tunnel in a chuckle. “Do you really think this is just about coffee?”
I didn't understand what he meant until we came to the end of the tunnel, which dipped into an alcove leading us into a large cave-like room. Drawing his gun, Jude scanned the dark. "Anyone in here?" He said, and Ana hit him. Silence answered, and I found myself paralyzed to the spot. I didn't know what to stare at first. The ten-foot-tall Starbucks Siren looming over us, illuminated in flickering orange candlelight, or the old swimming pool filled to the brim. When I took a step forward, my foot sunk into something soft, and I made the mistake of looking down. Bodies.
I guessed that was "The Drink".
I felt myself fall back, but Ana's warm arms were guiding me away from decomposing flesh which decapitated heads poisoned in a way that I could almost call ritualistic. There were bodies everywhere, all of them curled up or had died in a position of prayer. Jude crouched in front of a guy still in his Starbucks apron. His eyes had been cleanly plucked from his skull. Jude's expression was beautifully sombre in the candlelight. "Fuck, dude," he whispered.
"Looks like they got you."
“Which explains how they got their hands on our recipe.” Ana pulled out her gun and clicked off the safety. The girl’s eyes were suddenly sad, her lip wobbling. I had a hard time believing a girl who had taken out three baristas at point-blank range was crying.
"Through him."
“What is this place?” I whispered. "What the fuck are you doing in here?”
Jude straightened up. Ana moved behind him, and I noticed her hands holding her gun were trembling. She raised her arm, pointing it at the back of his head. Jude didn't retaliate, only sending me a sickly smile. "It used to be ours," he said. "Until other stores started opening, and it became a fucking free-for-all." Jude sighed, rocking back and forth on his heel. Ana's trigger finger followed his movements. "We have a peace treaty..." Jude trailed off. "Sorry. HAD a peace treaty." He nodded to his colleague. "Second Street has always been obsessed with this particular blend we have that other stores don't." His lips curved. "They're greedy, and thought they could fuck with us. First, they took our last manager. He was like a dad to us. Sliced him up and sent us his head." He gestured to his friend. "And then they took Ren. They brought this shit upon themselves."
As he spoke, Jude dropped to his knees and closed his eyes, bowing his head in front of the Siren. Ana didn't move. "Are you ready?"
“Always.”
I screamed, slamming my hand over my mouth when this time when Ana shot Jude point blank in the back of the head. When his body crumpled to the ground, something inside me snapped in two, and I couldn’t breathe suddenly. I thought the two were playing some kind of sick game before I caught unmistakable seeping black pooling across the alter.
In the blur of orange candlelight, it was almost a mesmerizing sight. “Shush!” Ana sent me an annoyed look, before gathering his body in her arm. “Make yourself useful and grab a bucket,” she said, stumbling towards the pool. I watched her, my heart diving into my throat. When I didn’t move, Ana hissed out and twisted around.
“Did you not hear me?!” she yelled. “Get a bucket and start collecting it!” The girl gestured towards a large, rusted pipe looming over the pool, a stream of murky brown water leaking into the pool. When I started forwards, the girl shook her head. “Not yet.” She said, before heaving Jude’s body and throwing him into the darkness. I heard the splash, but I didn’t even see his body hit the surface. Part of me wanted to demand what the fuck she was doing, but I did what I was told, with trembling hands, grabbing a bucket and shuffling over to the pool edge. Ana hissed out again. “I said not yet!” Before I could speak, she held a finger to her lips. “Do it now!”
“The pool water?!” I shrieked.
She raised a brow. “You think that’s water?”
Before I could coerce some kind of speech, I was interrupted by what felt like a sudden earthquake. The ground rumbled under our feet, and I hesitated before dropping the bucket into the water and scooping up as much as I could. I quickly realized it wasn’t water. It was thick with the constancy of blood, coffee brown and yet sticky and warm like blood.
Above us, the pipe seemed to come to life, a brand new stream of murky brown solution coming down in a waterfall. I didn’t think about the pieces of flesh floating on the surface, the decomposing heads I caught bobbing around, or the fact that I was dipping my hands in blood. Coffee and blood. My stomach was trying to projectile my lunch, but I swallowed it down. I took advantage, managing three buckets before Ana was grasping my shoulders and pulled me back. I didn’t realize I was sobbing until she was handing me a handkerchief, and I was staring at her and it, like, “What do you expect me to do with this?!”
Still in shock, I tried to get another bucket full before she dragged me from the pool edge. “You can stop now,” she said. “We have enough.”
"Enough what?!"
I staggered back when the surface of the pool rippled. I don’t know what I expected to come out.
Dead bodies?
Decapitated heads?
Not Jude, covered in the brown murky shit I had filled the buckets with. When he broke the surface, I almost threw one of the buckets at his head. Despite being covered in coffee and blood, his skin was oddly free of flaws. The guy was also really naked, which should have been a minor problem compared to what I was seeing, which was a real resurrection in front of a ten-foot statue of the Starbucks siren. Which was completely normal.
But I still found my cheeks heating up. Jude ran a hand through soaked curls sticking over his eyes, shaking them like a dog before pulling himself out. I couldn’t help noticing there was no gunshot wound. It was almost as if his body was completely new. I took in abnormally grey-looking skin, like dead flesh, before averting my gaze. “Did we do it?” He gasped out, immediately covering himself. Once out of the pool, he knelt on the ground, sucking in breaths of air before seemingly realizing the state of himself.
“Fuck. I didn’t think this through.”
“I did.” Ana reached into the backpack she had brought, pulling out a shirt and jeans, reverting her eyes, and throwing him the bundle. “Get dressed.” She said, But there was a slight smirk on her lips. “Yes. I think we managed to appease them.”
“Sweet!” Jude grinned, dressing quickly. He sucked the tips of his fingers. “Mmm.” He nodded at Ana. “That tastes a lot better.”
He gestured to her, and to my disgust, the girl delicately licked his fingers and nodded with her own smile. “It tastes like cherry blossom.”
His eyes fell on me, and I saw that inhuman gleam in his eye—that had been very much there before he was resurrected in a pool of coffee. His lip quirked. I could still see coffee-- or blood dripping in thick rivulets down his temples and cheek. “Should we?”
Jude turned to Ana. “I mean while we’re here, right? We can induct the newbie.”
Immediately, I knew what he was talking about. I stepped back, but he was following me, getting closer and closer until his breath was in my face, and I was teetering on the edge. I sensed something in his eyes, something I never expected from a man who knew exactly what he was doing. Envy. Another step, and I would be falling into what I was sure was a pool full of decomposing bodies and resurrecting coffee. “Not now,” Ana murmured, and Jude snapped out of it, taking a step back.
“Buzzkill.” He muttered.
But he did step away, allowing me to inch away from the pool.
“Later,” Ana said. “She’s shaken up. We can do it first thing tomorrow.”
To my surprise, there were no cops at the scene at Second Street. Because there was no scene.
The store was back to normal, and I didn’t have the energy to question why. When we returned, Aurora wrapped me into a hug I tried to get out of as quickly as possible, eager to get the fuck away from that place. But. I had to finish my shift. I had watched a man resurrected by coffee in a fucking Starbucks shrine, and yet somehow I had to keep making drinks until my shift ended. It was nearing closing time when the doors opened, and I found myself face-to-face with the girl from earlier. The one wearing the pink ray-bans.
She didn’t say anything, but the blade of her knife grazing my gut told me everything I needed to know. With a knowing look when she slipped off her raybans, she pressed something into my hand before leaving, and I handed it to the manager, who opened it up, almost died laughing, and then threw it in the trash.
“You work for psychopaths.” I managed to get out, sidling in front of Jude while he was clocking out.
“Also, didn’t you… didn’t you fucking die?”
Jude didn’t look up from his phone. “It’s complicated.” His lip quirked. “You’ll find out tomorrow during your induction.”
“But… you work for these people!” I lowered my voice. “And you’re not trying to get away?” I gestured to Kai and Aurora standing by the door, the two of them locked in conversation. “None of you?”
Jude frowned, and I caught the first hint of annoyance. I had only seen this guy smiling, so seeing him scowling was quite the change. “I’m sorry, do you… do you think I have a choice?”
He surprised me with a laugh. “Me? A choice? You really think I wake up every morning and WANT to do this shit?” He got close, his breath in my ear. “You came here willingly. I didn’t. In fact? I don’t even remember coming here. My interview, my first day? Nothing. I don’t even remember my time at Second Street.” He threw a towel at me before I could coerce words. “Finish clearing up, all right? I’ll see you tomorrow for induction.”
There was something cruel in his smile like he was waiting for whatever my induction had in store for me.
I couldn’t help myself. When everyone was gone, and I was tasked with locking up, I picked the discarded note out of the trash, smoothing it down.
“You pieces of shit just declared war. Sleep with one eye open! 😊”
Cora xx.”
….
I cut my finger with a knife this morning. When I sucked it and grabbed a band-aid, I tasted coffee. I went home and threw up coffee.
I am peeing coffee.
I showered 8 times and I still fucking smell of coffee.
I don’t think I’m going to go to work tomorrow.
Edit: There’s been a break-in— and the manager wants me to come in early. Jude and Ana woke me up in the middle of the night to go over tactics. We are taking down Second Street during closing time.
I guess I am going to work tomorrow.
Does anyone know how to use a gun?

My first crush was actually my best friend. He was a short and cutely pudgy boy with hazel eyes I used to get lost in if we are being honest. We became friends one day when I saw him walking around in my neighborhood. I was.new and wanted to make friends so I offered him an ice cream and asked if he wanted to hangout.
At the time.he was depressed, on the messy side and honestly confused why I even bothered talking to him. Eventually though we became thick as thieves. At the time.i was not aware that my feelings had grown into something more since I was extremely closeted at the time thanks to a bit of religious trauma.
He would stay over night with me most nights and we would listen to the radio and talk about making a band while playing Tony Hawk and Call of Duty. My mind would wander to the two of us growing old besides each other.
Soon I came to the conclusion that I was bisexual and I had fallen in love with the boy who had been beside me since I was six. It didn't help that we were in high school and I was super hormonal.
The issue came with the fact I had a girlfriend. The two of us were good friends who figured we might as well try dating the problem was that when there were no feelings she didn't want to hurt my feelings by breaking it off. I on the other hand was afraid because her friend group who I saw as my only friends in school didn't care much for me. I knew if I broke it off they would paint it as me breaking her heart and make me the bad guy.
While this was happening he confessed he would be open to giving something between us a try. I felt like I was on cloud nine about him.confessing that and it drew us closer. I got to see a softer side of him and even got to hug and hold him. I didn't want to be a cheater so I had to wait.
My so called friends begged to be the ones to tell me. They looked giddy and raced to me hoping to be the first to say it but they seemed upset I wasn't bothered. I was thankful that I could finally go back to being friends with my Ex and start a new relationship.
Things did not go this way, instead my parents discovered I was Gay by going through my phone. They were cold towards me and I was really emotional. I took solace in spending time with him and my ex. But they seemed to hit it off and bonded. Soon enough he distanced himself from me and was honestly cruel. But they seemed to be leaving me behind.
I accepted that the two of them got together despite how much it hurt to my core. I never confessed so I bit my tongue when they would talk about each other in a loving way. Soon enough my life felt like it was crumbling around me.
My so called friends treated me like the Meg Griffin of the group, my parents acted differently with me because of.my discovered sexuality, I was overwhelmed in the school work the all.my honors classes and ROTC gave me. The worst part was watching my crush happy without me.
I figured maybe I could talk to him.abkut my situation (not about my crush but the whole parental situation) I remember we used to talk about our problems together. He would tell me about his alcoholic dad or how nobody liked him and bullied him during our middle school days. I recall trying to prove to him that he was worth being around and that he shouldn't think about wanting to kill himself. I said I would always be his shoulder to cry on.
I started to talk about the situation with my parents with him, hoping to hear some words to help me keep going. Instead he was cruel, talking to.me.like I was beneath him. He told.me how.i.needed to grow up and stop crying to other people about petty problems. He talked about how.if I wasn't such a pussy people would actually like me. The tears fell from my eyes and my heart felt like it was going to give out on me.
My parents don't really believe in therapy, believing that you should just "not let it get to you" so in my worst state I had nobody to turn to. Instead of.goving up though I decided to make a change.
Reaching high school.i came out as openly gay, fighting my parents with lipstick and nail polish while distancing myself from the toxic friend group. I became a completely different person and lost interest in either my crush or my ex. In the end they married after eight years and I have grown into my True self.
My parents finally giving in to the fact I won't change. I would be lying of I said we had the same relationship but it is ok for now. I would say that that moment hurt me and made me shut my heart out to people. That is something I truly regret from.the situation.
I would say to anyone who is going through this just remember that not everything that glitters is gold. Sometimes you pick up false gold but that doesn't mean to give up because eventually you will find what you are looking for. You will find the one but love takes time.
It is a journey that will be full of happiness and sorrow. Heartache will heal

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Esecially like those long fake nails you see people get on tiktok and garbage like that, the ones that have little nick-knacks inside of five layers of resin and glitter paint and like a charm or three dangling off the ends of them. I imagine they hold the TP like their hand is a lobster claw when the wipe.

Here I am writing an in-depth review of Eurovision 2023. 2021 was my first Eurovision since Alexander Rybak won my heart with Fairytale. I missed 2022 due some...stuff. And 2023 may be my favourite year since I came back.
So I am doing a shot for a shot review of this year's contest.
A few notes;

• I will be going off the BBC Broadcast from BBC iPlayer. This will be my third time watching this year's contest.
• I will be ranking all the acts including intervals, alongside some comments on the in between segments.
• this is all my personal rankings, so please don't be mad.

Opener: Kalush Orchestra- Stefania ft Sam Ryder, Andrew Lloyd Weber, Joss Stone, Miss Banks, and Kate Middleton I did not watch 2022 (only select songs on YouTube) so I never saw this performance, but Kalush came out in a blend of backstage walking in a tube station (where the auditions took place) and into the stadium in Liverpool.
This was highlighted with cameos from British rappers and music stars including Sam Ryder, who did an awesome guitar bit. Andrew Lloyd Weber made an appearance, Joss Stone, Miss Banks...this felt like a star studded version of Stefania that the band could not perform in Ukraine.
Towards the end of the backstage and tubey bits, we have a royal cameo with Kate Middleton herself performing a piano solo! I missed that on both watches before this! I was surprised!
And then we get a super transition complete with a marching band, as Kalush performs the song in Liverpool and this may be one of my favourite openers ever. I might be biased because I really rate this song. This might be my favourite Ukaraine entry not named Go_A. It was really pushed home with the celeb cameos and features.
Final Rating: 8.5/10
Flag Ceremony NO RATING
We now get the traditional flag ceremony where we get the 26 finalists to come out to British anthems including Blur, Annie Lennox, Prodigy and more mixed in with Ukrainian acts from Eurovision including Go_A, Eurovision winner Jamala, Tina Karol, and one of my favourite Eurovision acts of all time, Verka!
It was a fun little tour down nostalgia lane alongside the first exposure of the acts for this year!
Segment with the hosts
For non-British viewers, you may not know the hosts; so let's go over them!
Mel C from the iconic Spice Girls is the arena MC for this evening. As viewers, we don't get to hear much of her, but for Liverpool, I bet that was a nice little grab!
Alesha Dixon is probably the best known out of the three English hosts. Being a part of Mis-Teeq, she shot to fame with 'Scandalous' in the 2000s before going solo.
Julia Sanina I don't know much about, but I wanted to take the moment to say her contrasting dress with Alesha for the Ukrainian flag colours was so great!
Hannah Waddingham is slowly becoming England's next national treasure. Her Emmy award winning work includes Ted Lasso amongst many things.
Graham Norton is an Irish TV host that has been synonymous with the BBC since I was a child in the early 2000s. He took over as Eurovision commentator when the late, great, Sir Terry Wogan passed away. He is also an out and proud gay man, and his self-named chat show is watched globally.
If you are interested in who did commentary, it was Graham Norton, and the amazing Mel Geidroyc. Mel has been doing TV as long as I have been alive and has mainly been a comedian and TV Host, synomous with the BBC. Mel, alongside best friend Sue Perkins, are both seen as national treasures in the UK.
The hosts go over the rules and Hannah does...an improv French piece? I don't know French so I can't translate that. It is then time for the first act.
I will not go over the post cards.
Austria - Teya and Salena - Who The Hell Is Edgar?
I love the backstory to this song. The producer had no idea who Edgar Allen Poe was! And so the song was born.
The song was bouncy, and it was like I was in the clubs in 2010. But unfortunately, it was nothing I had not heard before. It was generic pop, but that was not to say it was not bad!
The chorus was in my head all freaking night, and the girls choreography was fantastic and on full point. The bridge kinda dwindled the song for a bit and it went on a little longer for what it was.
The striking and contrasting colours of red and white were as equally memorable as the chorus.
Overall, solid entry but it's not quite one I think will win on any ESC.
7.4/10
Portugal - Mimicat - Ai Carocao
This song was a disappointment to be honest. I did like the cabaret and burlesque themes, but the crowd engagement and uniqueness never grasped me as much as I felt.
The crowd was into it and the dancers were into it, incorporating a lot of Latin and Portuguese dances - salsa, in particular.
Unfortunately, it was just not grasping enough to be a solid contender. If I saw this on a different night out in a Portuguese lounge, I would definitely be dancing away!
7.4/10
Switzerland - Remo Forrer - Watergun
I don't like ballads. I find them slow, tiring, and meloncholic for the sake of being meloncholic. And at the end of the song...I really enjoyed this! This was one of my top 3 songs of the night. I don't know why people did not enjoy it.
Reno's voice is strong and his presence for the stage at such a young age is incredible and I predict a strong future for him and possibly an ESC return in a few years time.
The irony of a Swiss man singing about not wanting to be a soldier made me laugh. But other than that, I really, really enjoyed this song!
8.7/10
Poland - Blanka - Solo
Ugh. This was BAD! I liked it on first listen but after re-listens...it did not age well. It's summer pop in a typical 2010 beat and unlike Austria, this song had nothing memorable.
It did not even have a solo! Points deducted!
It was just...not a good song. But hey, it's better than a certain song about to be played!
6.5/10
Serbia - Luke Black - Samo Me Si Spada
I...
This was the worst song of the night for me. The lyrics were incoherent mumbles into the microphone followed by unplugging dancers who did nothing for 90% of the performance?
I get he has a huge following online but I'm sorry, I'm not a fan. This incoherent mess of mumbles and bright lights was clearly Billy Eilish inspired, but it was so far off the mark. You can hear him panting into the mic as he sings, so clearly his endurance needs work.
One of the worst songs I have seen in ESC history including the UK's Embers song of 2021...
3/10
France - La Zarra - Evidement
The crowd needed an energetic ear worm after that...mess.
La Zarra delivered but was it too safe for France? France is known for some knock out hits in Eurovision in recent years...and I feel this was not one of them.
Whilst it was strong, it was not 2022, 2021, or 2018 France. Her dress sense and the bright, strobing performance contrasted her muted yet energetic performance.
And the crowd was really into it! Solid performance, but just a little too safe from Le Frans.
7.5/10
Cyprus - Andrew Lambrou - Break A Broken Heart
I'm not a fan of when a country outsources to another country, with a singer or band with heritage from that country. Case in point, Australian Andrew Lambrou who has Cypriot parents, performed for Cyprus despite being Australian.
However, this was a good little pop ballad. It was catchy, memorable, and this song felt like a chart hit. That being said, his performance did not feel heavy or had the gravity of a performer. It felt like a glorified karaoke performance in this regard.
But it was not a bad song! It was catchy, emotional, and definitely powerful.
7.4/10
Spain - Blanca Paloma - Eaea
This was a weirdly beautiful song, that felt like a dream sequence. The beat is clearly aboriginal or ancient Spanish, and the veil adds another level of entrigue. It is definitely folk inspired for sure.
It was soothing, but oddly creepy in the sense it was super atmospheric.
I don't know what to think of this song in all fairness.
6.7/10
Sweeden - Loreen - Tattoo
I am conflicted.
This is a good song, but Eurovision winner quality? No. It felt boring for a lot of it, and the Avant Garde pop elements and...whatever those nails were did nothing for me.
Loreen is stunning, and has an incredible voice for sure. But this did absolutely nothing for me, and was not a winning quality song.
Very catchy and memorable chorus, and the press machine she was in is very unique in terms of performance. But that is about it.
8/10
Albania - Albina and the Klemendi Family - Duje
This was a mess.
Everyone seemed lost, and the song had no clear direction. The backing singers looked bored, and it just felt so, so, so uninspired. I don't have many positive remarks about this song.
It's not Luke Black...that's about it.
4/10
Italy - Marco Mengoni - Due Vite
Ok. I'm not a fan of sad songs that are sad just because. It's one thing for every song in this contest to be a banger, but unfortunately you also have Luke Black (and no, I have about 100 Luke Black jokes to throw in here).
That being said, it might not be my thing, but the emotional outpour from Marco was something to behold.
It's not my thing, but I can appreciate it. That's 3 straight bangers from Italy with Måneskin, Mahmood, and now Marco - MMM.
7.7/10
Estonia - Alika - Bridges
I was not knowing what to expect...and then I saw the Piano and I got instant Amy Lee vibes. Amy Lee is one of my favourite vocalists of all time and Evanescence was me for...a long time.
As soon as Alike opened her mouth...goosebumps. She sounds so much like Alike, in fact, this track would not go amiss on an Evanescence album. It's just a beautiful song by a beautiful woman. The bright blue dress and self playing piano were symbolistic of this memorable performance.
Just a fantastically beautiful performance!
8.3/10
Finland - Karrija - Cha Cha Cha
I'm coming straight off the bat.
This is one of my favourite songs I have EVER heard on ESC. From dancing, to stage presence, to the blending of pop and metal to create this beast. The rapping in Finnish, and then the screaming cha cha cha...and then the hidden pop verse at the end, leading to the bridge...we will never have another song like this.
It felt like Til Lindermann of Ramnsteinn and Electric Callboy had a baby. This made me dance. It made me scream. And was the song of the night for sure.
Even the insane dancing fit!
How he was robbed I have no idea! This was an insane performance and joins Fairytale, Hard Rock Hallelujah, and Zitt E Buoni as my favourite songs ever performed at ESC.
9.8/10
Chezia - Vesna - My Sister's Crown
After Finland, I was not expecting a bop. But we got a bop!
I have a soft spot for well put together girl groups, and this is definitely a well put together girl group. It is an empowering, feminist song that has a lot of folk moments, rapping, great chereography and it was just a nice package.
I just wish it had a stand out moment. That was what really pushed me back on this song.
Also a very pink performance.
8/10
Australia - Voyager - Promise
I am coming in knowing who Voyager are. I was surprised and when they came to perform...I was very impressed.
It's a poppy song, and it is insanely catchy! But then halfway through the song, you get this brutal breakdown and an insane progressive riff from the female guitarist. Even the backing singing was great!
The set was all Night Rider themed and felt like I was going through a synthwave. It was just what we needed to continue after two straight bangers. Another freaking banger!
It even has a keytar solo!!!!
Pretty sure this is gonna be a Eurovision classic for years to come.
Oh oh oh ohohoh.
8.8/10
Belgium - Gustaph - Because Of You
This next performance is a little...ehhh for me.
But that does not mean I don't like it! It is just a little out of time for me. It seems like a hit that would do really well in the late 90s and early 2000s. In fact, I can see this song winning if it was earlier.
The beat is strong and the dress game is strong here.
Also as a side note; Gustav and Marco Mengoni did a really good job this year for the LGBT community. As a member myself, these two songs really were a great show!
7.7/10
Skit With Graham Norton
This is just classic UK cheese!
We catch back up with Graham in the commentary booth watching old Eurovision DVDs and he deliberately throws popcorn on the floor 🤣 it's just cheese to the maximum. Graham is a master of the cheese, and has made a career of it.
Skit with Mel Geidroyc
And now we get a weird skit where Mel Geidroyc is churning butter...I died from laughter 🤣🤣
Some great comedy relief all night long.
Armenia - Brunette - Future Lover
And now we get back into the pop train. And this was one of the better pop songs of the night (the best is yet to come). And like Luke Black, she begins laying down...and unlike Luke Black, she produces a good song.
Look, no hate for Luke at all but...come on!
Anyway. Back to Brunette. She goes from smooth to rap and then straight up pop. She channels her inner Serj Tankien here by experimenting in multiple voice notes.
And there is a dance break which is one of the better dance breaks of the night.
Overall, it's a good song but it's nothing special. We see one of these tracks every year.
7.7/10
Moldova - Pasha Parfeni - Soreli Si Luna
This is by far the best song that shows what Eurovision is about. It is full of Eastern European culture, a fantastic flute, two very cute (the one on the right in particular) and very energetic folk drummers slash dancers, and some really cool visuals. Some beautiful dancing and a powerful presence on stage.
I'm surprised this did not do better. Alongside Remo Forrer, I'm really surprised these hits got slept on.
I adore Pasha. And I really want to see him represent Moldova again in the future. Third time is the charm Pasha!
9/10
Ukaraine - Tvorchi - Heart of Steel
First of all, well done Tvorchi. Minutes before they went live, their hometown of Ternopol was invaded by Russia. I don't want to go into anymore, so I won't.
But this song...I was not a fan. Stefania blew me away, and Shum is an all time favourite ESC track for me. And this song failed to live up to either. But the vocals and visuals were very, very strong. Combining realistic VCG and SFX was one thing, but this felt like I was at a sci-fi DJ convention.
That being said, I was not a fan. It felt rushed and over produced with an emphasis on visual reactions and not auditory. I was just impressed they performed minutes after hearing the worst news of their life.
7.5/10
Norway - Alessandra - Queen of Kings
YASSS QUEEN!
I really enjoyed this song! From Alessandra's incredible singing and the hookworms - this is the catchiest song of the night. The dancing was on point, and the crowd was really into it.
Any other year, this would be a top 3 song. But this year was stacked. It was not 2021 stacked, but it was stacked. And she is so young! I see her bringing it home to Norway in the future.
Speaking of Norway, I hear a lot Alexander Rybak tunes in this. I now want a collav between the two.
The song could have done without that High note...
8.4/10
Germany - Lord of the Lost - Blood And Glitter
This is my style of music. Heavily Rammstein inspired, I would have preferred if Electric Callboy was in this spot but for what ever reason...it never happened.
But LotL still produced a banger. It has screams, growls, sweet and bitter notes...it was a nice little metal performance to kick the last leg of the night off.
I see why it did so poorly. But I am also hopeful Electric Callboy offer a Karrija style performance next year.
The outfits threw me off a bit however...
8.7/10
Lithuania - Monika Linkyte - Stay
Monika is great.
Her song however, was very mid. It comes across as an Adele esque song, and without the backing singers, I would knock a few points off. It's not that she had a bad night...I just think this was the wrong choice.
Especially as she had a banger in 2015.
The chorus (which I think is Lithuanian) was very catchy however. It was memorable for that and unfortunately, that alone.
I want to see Monika again. But sadly, I also see Lithuania dropping out due to bad results in recent years.
7.2/10
Israel - Noa Kirel - Unicorn
Pop song of the night.
If Karijja and Loreen did not compete...Noa would win. Hands down. Her song was everything a Eurovision audience loves. It was not my song of the night - Luke Black, that goes to you - but this was VERY close.
From the poppy vibes to the incredible dance break at the end (which she nearly broke into a straight out breakdown...)...she has everything a breakout star needs. I see her career going global after this. She was loads better then Netta who won a few years ago and still lost.
Just put that into perspective.
Great performance - the last great performance of the night.
8.8/10
Slovenia - Joker Out - Carpe Diem
I heard nothing but great things about Bojan. And I came into this contest wit high expectations. And...they were not met.
The song was great. Really well wrote. But it seemed like they were playing to the camera as opposed to the crowd. And I wish they involved them more.
But that being said, Bojan has charisma, a great voice, and his band are very involved too. I can see these guys having a Måneskin like career if they continue this direction. But Bojan could break out at any minute if you ask me.
I also think the song was a bit too safe for them. I was expecting a more...funkier beat. This just felt like a FIFA Soundtrack level song.
7.8/10
Croatia - Let 3 - Mama SC
I...
Look. I get this was a joke and sticking it to Putin but...
This was a straight up meme. A sh**post if you so wish. And I'm all for it but they threw away an entry.
The crowd seemed puzzled as well. As was I!
5/10
United Kingdom - Mae Muller - I Wrote A Song
Oh Mae...
You wrote a song, yes. But it was terrible. Song structure, chorus, your vocals...this was not the song, Mae.
Again, I am using my platform to criticize my countries internal selection process. It's about time you stop looking at TikTok and go to local and national talent shows, gigs, even festivals. Once again, the selection committee picking a preferred song from personal bias over talent.
I could go on and on.
But I'm also using my platform to say the dancers were wicked and I would take the blonde guys number.
Back to the song!
I was dissapointed especially after Sam Ryder in 2022...but I expected this. I'm sorry Mae, I hope your well!
3.9/10
Voting opens, we get a recap, I go for a pee
It is now time for the interval acts. During both previous runs, I missed these as I was probably on a booze run. So this was the first time I watched the interval.
Interval: Sam Ryder
I never listened to Spaceman last year, so this is my first exposure to Sam. And after watching his song before watching this...I was impressed!
This is the first act the UK has sent to ESC in years I enjoyed, and this song would have been a contender...if the selection committee ran it back. But nope.
This was a smooth, catchy song that was highly enjoyable! A good interval act. And that guitar solo was better then Blanka's non existing solo.
Also Roger Taylor!!! Love that man.
8.5/10
We get a little cameo by Jan Leeming, the host of Eurovision back when it was hosted in my neck of the woods in Harrogate, way before I was born!!
Julia then cuts a little bit with displaced Ukrainians under the protection of the United Kingdom. It's actually really emotional, and i was moved by it! So glad we could do this for them.
Timor then meets with Alesha and I am so proud of these Ukrainians who performed under such horrible circumstances.
Another recap, another shot of tequila
Interval: Liverpool Songbook NO RATING
As I was born in the North East if England, I don't like Liverpool. But the music that Liverpool has produced is numerous and plentiful. So it was only right ESC decided to honour Liverpool's greats.
I love these Collab intervals!
Mahmood is out first and covers Imagine by the late, great, John Lennon. I was not a fan of this cover, but the original I highly rate. So that might be why.
The song then smoothly transitions to Netta who covers You Spin Me Right Round, and I forgot how great Netta is. She might have performed this better then Dead or Alive. I call for all Netta fans to be called 'Nettles'.
Next is Dadi Fryer with Whole Again by The Atomic Kittens. So, when I was a kid, I refused to go to bed without this song being played.
How did my dad not know I was gay, I don't know.
Anyway. This was a great cover! As always Dadi, blows it away. One of my fave Icelandic acts.
We then gert Cornelia Jakobs covering I Turn To You by the studio MC...Mel C. She even looks a lot like Mel C here! I was never a fan of this song, but Cornelia makes it fun at the very least! Very 90s look here, and she plays with water in a white tank top. So props to her for being comfortable with that!
We then get the return of one of United Kingdom's greatest acts and someone I had the privilege of meeting in 2022 whilst on holiday - Sonia, with her song Better The Devil You Know.
This was way before I got into ESC, but I saw her perform this song. And this was tons better then seeing her live! Also, cute dancers.
And finally, we get Duncan Lawrence cover You Will Never Walk Alone - the theme song for the legendary Liverpool FC. The entire crowd sang along with this, and we were joined by many, many, many personalities including Go_A, Hannah Waddingham, Julia, Alesha Dixon, Graham Norton, and so many more. And this rendition actually made me cry. I never cry at music.
Worthy of note, on the BBC Broadcast, at the end of this performance, Mel Geidroyc spams 'Sonia' constantly.
Was pretty funny.
End of review
I won't bother reviewing the voting process, so thank you for reading my review! Before I go, I am handing out my awards;
The Johnny Logan MVP Award (best performer) - Karijja - Cha Cha Cha
Lordi Award For Best Headbanger (best metal or rock song) - Cha Cha Cha - Karijja
Best Solo Award - Promise - Voyager
Best Dance Break - Unicorn - Noa Kirel
Best Backup Dancers - I Wrote A Song - Mae Muller
The Alexander Rybak Award For Minimal Performance - Watergun - Remo Forrer
The Nil Pois Award For Worst Song of the Night - Sero Mi Se Spada - Luke Black.

Laying in bed, my hand rested on my bump. How did I end like this? Demonic and pregnant, that very statement sounding like a cheap movie title. Demy slumbered next to me, the day was ours to be had. Demy promised me a date today, and I suppose I should take it. Swinging my feet over the edge of the bed, a black box waited for me. Opening the top, my breath was stolen from me. Golden lace sparrows flew over a scarlet rockabilly dress, my shaking fingers pulling it out. Holding it to my body, the measurements were exact to me. The mattress creaked as Demy sat up, the morning sun bathing his handsome features.
“Do you like it? I ordered it a couple of weeks ago. Hopefully, it will fit.” He yawned groggily, rubbing his eyes. “I also ordered new jeans for you, considering that they won’t fit eventually. Try it on.” Tugging on my snug bra, the dress fit perfectly. Loving the way the skirt floated away from me, Demy was already dressed in a simple black dress shirt and dark jeans. His casual look threw me off, a scythe charm dangled off of his wrists. Staring at him with pure bewilderment, he tugged his hair into a neat man bun. Shrugging his shoulders, he sauntered over to me. His hungry eyes devoured me.
“I like it very much.” I stammered with a fluttering heart. Wrapping his arm around the small of my waist, his lips pressed against mine passionately. Arching my body towards him, time stopped once more. Why did this keep happening! Releasing me from his spell, his forehead pressed against mine.
“I forgot to tell you that I can disguise myself. Now I look like an albino goth.” He explained playfully, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear. “Let me fix your hair.” Brushing through it, he twisted it into a simple side braid. Kicking over my boots, he kissed my forehead while I slid on my boots. Spinning around the room, he swung me underneath him. Smothering me in kisses, he placed me on his back. Walking downstairs, we burst out onto the busy street. People smiled at us as he took every turn to an abandoned mansion. Vines had claimed the red brick, the metal porches barely hanging on.
“I bought it for us.” He proclaimed proudly, placing his hands on his hips. “I thought it was time we got a place of our own. What do you think?” Tears welled up in my eyes, my hand falling on my bump. He didn’t have to, my other hand clenching into a tight ball. Glancing up at the top window, a lone female spirit floated in her flowing nightgown. Cocking my head, shadowy hands ripped her back. Bursting through the front door, dust covered the water damaged walls. Sprinting upstairs, my fingers curled around my staff. The stairs creaked dangerously underneath my boots, a jump in the air saving me from a painful fall as the steps crumbled. Landing on the metal railing, my boots clanged against the metal with every step. A ghost was in trouble, the scene shifting around me. Demy caught up to me, the inside of the house rewinding back in time. Pristine walls with ornate wallpaper greeted me, Demy letting out a long sigh.
“We are trapped in another time bubble.” He groaned to himself, rubbing his forehead. “We know the only way out is to kill the ghost who brought us here. This bubble reeks of something else though. Can you smell the sulfur?” Sniffing the air, he wasn’t wrong. Hiding me underneath the staircase, my breath hitched at his body pressed against mine. A man with chocolate brown hair and caramel eyes landed inches from us, blood pouring from his eyes. A child’s scream snapped me from my horror filled trance, a thirteen year old girl ran by us with her long brown waves flying behind her. A shadow figure chased after her, a jagged blade sliding through her chest. Watching the ruby drops hit the floor, the worn wooden handle became stained with her blood. Dropping to the floor, her hand reached for me. The demon snapped its head towards us, rows of bloody fangs clicked together. Spinning his blade in his palm, his wrist flicked abruptly, Demy’s back caught the blade, his scythe charm glowing red hot. Pushing the knife out with his muscles, the charm grew to its full size. Ravens cawed behind him, the bracelet turning back into his top hat. Scarlet flames twisted with golden flames, the feathers floating behind me. Cocking his head back, crazed laughter burst from his lips.
“You are going to have to find me first.” He taunted cruelly, clapping his hands. “I will never let you claim my home.” Demy narrowed his eyes in his direction, the annoyance disappearing into the floor. Coming out of our hiding spot, jazz music played outside. Creeping around the corner, my flames died down for a second. A pile of bright yellow liquid coated the spot he went through, Demy crouching down to examine it.
“He is ancient.” He grumbled under his breath, his kind gaze watched me take in the information. “The brighter the sulfur the older they are.” Feeling stupid for not understanding him, the solution wasn’t obvious to me. Shifting uncomfortably, no words came to the tip of my tongue. The ghost of the girl floated over to me, tears flowing endlessly down her cheeks. Her hair floated up behind her, her quaking hands gripping her ragged nightgown. Her milky eyes met mine, surprise rounding her eyes at my outreached hand.
“We are going to get rid of him for you. Unfortunately, I don’t think I can free you because of the whole murder thing. Maybe we can find your father.” I offered sincerely, her icy hands cupping mine. “We can turn on the television for you every now and then. I’ll even cook your favorite foods so you can smell them. The one thing you have to do is help me out. Can you do that?” The spirit of the father floated around the corner, his snow white hair danced wildly. Fixing his mustache, his milky eyes fell on us. Dusting off his suit, he cleared his throat. Holding out his hand, I gave it one good firm shake.
“I am Mr. Smillet and that is my daughter Milly. We would love to help you.” He introduced himself politely, ruffling his daughter’s hair. “Unfortunately, we can’t leave because of an eternal curse on the land but your idea sounds lovely. Let’s make this place a home once more.” Floating through the floor, his head popped up through the center of the hole.
“This is going to sound backwards but he is in the attic.” He chirped warmly, pulling himself out. “We will lead the way.” Walking past the photos of them, the nineteen twenties raged outside. Stopping at the attic door, they took a step back. Thanking them silently, we pushed the door open. Pressing our backs against the wall, the stairs creaked with every step. Glancing behind me, the door slammed shut behind us. The only light flickered, my heart seconds from beating out of my chest. Pop! A sea of darkness swallowed us, cold breezes lashing our cheeks. Summoning my flames, my heart sank into the pit of my stomach at his face inches from mine. Slamming my heel into his chest, he smashed into the wall. Climbing the stairs, I kicked a pile of boxes down the stairs. Spinning my scythe over my head, balls of flames whipped in his direction. Stopping them before they hit him, he raised his hand over his head. Hundreds of those damn daggers spun over his head, my metal feathers destroying them upon impact. Snapping his fingers, cold hands smashed through the floorboards. Slicing my palm on an exposed nail, Demy seemed to be dealing with his own problems. Smearing my hand on the wall, the scent was enough for me to summon my pets. Whistling sharply, the attic door rattled violently. Wet snarls echoed on the other side, my three pets taking him down to the ground. Pulling his gun from his pocket, Demy towered over the howling demon. Pressing his gun to his forehead, his finger tugged on the trigger. His bullet burst from the end, his body decaying to ash. My pets bounded up to me, their tails wagging a mile a minute. Rubbing their bellies, they melted into puddles.
“Who are good doggies!” I spoke with my dog mom’s voice, tongues licking my face left and right. The time bubble still remained, my eyes narrowing. Something felt off, a glowing orb bounced in the corner. Walking over to it cautiously, the ball of light floated into my clammy palm. Tears welled up in my eyes, the spirit was her mother. The real reason the time bubble existed was because of her, her soul purpose had been served. She stayed behind to protect them, one more thing stopping her.
“I need you to promise to take care of them.” She spoke gently, the orb floating in the air. “I can’t stay here because I dragged myself outside of the property line. I need to know that they will be okay.” Drops of light hit the floor, sobs bounced off the wall. Demy embraced me from behind, his chin resting on my head. Flashing the orb with his crooked grin, the drops of light slowed to a halt.
“We vow to give them a lovely afterlife. I was thinking we could give them the attic.” He promised sincerely, kissing the top of my head. “We can furnish the space as they wish. Then they can hang out with us downstairs. How does that sound?” Thinking for a minute, the orb floated into the sky. The time bubble glitched, a dusty attic greeting us. Pressing my palm to the splintered floor, a bright light blinded us. Covering his eyes, the light died down. Pristine floors brushed against my palm, a neat bedroom pleased me. The simple furniture would do, a picture of the girl's family hung on the wall. Running downstairs, the two spirits waited on the other side of the door. Opening the door for them, I motioned for them to go on up. Gasps of wonder bounced off the wall, my eyes scanning the scarlet walls. The hall seemed empty, my fingers tracing the one ancient mirror. Demy’s jaw dropped, my finger picking it up.
“If I can heal living things I can bring inanimate objects back to life.” I bragged with a wide grin, poking it to see if it was real. “I didn’t think I could do this well. We do have to get some furniture though. I could only manifest theirs because it had existed at one point. Do you like it?” Parting his lips to speak, a distraught woman sprinted in. One of our marks entered the hall, I put my foot out. Not seeing my foot, his face smashed onto the floor. Pressing my staff into his back, he put his hands up. The silky onyx hair contrasted the restored wooden floors, my three dogs surrounding him.
“If you move a fucking muscle you'll become dog chow.” I snapped hotly, flaming feathers hovered over him. “Tell me why you were cha-” My face dead panned at my former colleague charging at me with a haunted expression. Grabbing her by the arm, I tossed her over my head. The floor groaned in protest, the boards repairing themselves. Examining her closer, her eyes were ruby. Her lilac waves cascaded down her back, the white frilly Lolita dress hugged her petite body. A diamond collar sparkled on her neck, my eyes falling on the inky stain spreading on the white lace. Sniffing the air, I let them both go. A nasty bugger limped down the hall, a curved lilac blade quivered in his sludgy back. Demy raised his scythe, his ravens cawing behind him. Harsh winds blew our hair around, my flames roaring to life. Crouching down to their level, I yanked both of the heads up by their hair.
“If I help you, you join my army. No ifs, and or buts.” I barked sternly, the two of them nodding. “Sit back and watch the show.” Resting against the wall, her master fussed over her. Spinning my staff over my head, flaming feathers landed in the body. Demy leapt over my head, his scythe cutting into the body. The demon roared, horror rounding our eyes as it absorbed our power. Opening up its mouth, a wall of lilacs blocked its path. An idea came to mine, the flames of the burning lilacs illuminating my features.
“We need to hit it with everything we have.” I whispered so it wouldn’t hear, bewildered expressions meeting my determined grin. “You have trust in me.” Allowing my powers to build up at the top of my staff, Demy’s pure power built at the end of his scythe. Swinging our weapons at the same time, a rush of hot air blew our hair back. Taking the mirror off the wall, I held it in front of us. Let’s see how much power he could take. Demy held me by my hips in preparation for the impact. Absorbing the power as I had planned, a beam of our power slid us back a few feet. The beam hit him, the cracks beginning to form on his skin. Absorbing the doubled energy, he blasted the mirror again. The frame creaked, the beam striking the mirror once more. Demy held me down with all of his strength. The game of tennis continued until the energy decayed him into a pile of ash. Lowering the mirror, the house repaired itself. Demy huffed behind me, his arm spinning me around. Kissing me hungrily, he seemed grateful that I was alive. Crouching down to her level, Demy’s top hat absorbed his scythe and ravens.
“Where is she wounded? I won’t hurt her. I want to heal her.” I assured him kindly, the fellow demon taking a step back. “Do you mind?” Lifting up her dress, a nasty spike stuck out of her back. Ripping it out, she cussed like a sailor. Hovering my hand over the gaping wound, her muscle fused back together. Watching her skin patch itself, a nasty scar throbbed underneath my touch. Demy kicked her blade over, her trembling fingers gripping the worn leather hilt with raw terror.
“You must be Davidos Darth and Lilac Mattson. These two defected a couple of years ago.” Demy explained calmly, the petite woman embracing me graciously. “They were just hunted down by one of her sludgy monsters. The Golden Lion must be after you. The question is why.” A two year old girl peeked out from around the corner, her lilac waves grazing the floor. A white summer dress floated away from her body, her ruby eyes falling on me. A bright smile illuminated Lilac’s purple lips, the girl’s purple lips curling into a matching smile.
“Mommy!” She cried out, Lilac tossing me to the floor as she caught her daughter. “I am glad you are safe. I hid in my invisibility bubble like you told me too. Who is the pretty lady?” Crouching down to her level, I held out my hand.
“I am Scarlet Deaclon, your mother’s best friend. How do you feel about living here? Is that alright with your mother?” I inquired sweetly, her face lighting up. “I can’t have you guys running like that. I will put a protection spell on the house if it makes you feel better. Us defectors have to stick together.” Silent tears stained Lilac’s cheek, Davidos seemed seconds from crying.
“Seriously, I can’t have you guys on the street. Fight with me and we can have a miniature family.” I continued jovially, ruffling the girl’s beautiful hair. “I can also babysit if you need it.” Lilac began to sob, several fresh cuts and bruises caught my eyes.
“Why are you being so nice?” She wept softly, wiping away her tears. “I don’t deserve it. We left in s-” Putting my hand in the air, confusion mixed with sadness. Cupping her face, she quaked underneath my touch.
“She is the best reason to leave.” I comforted her kindly, my three dogs bounding up to the little girl. “Don’t worry they don’t bite. What’s her name?” Oreo, Stripes, and Darkness smothered her in love, the girl's giggles twinkled in the air. The four of them played as Davidos helped Lilac to her feet, Demy pacing back and forth. An irritated growl rumbled in his throat, a hand on his shoulder calming him down. He had to know that we needed allies, his lips brushing against the top of my head. Fishing around his pocket, a worn pocket knife sat in my palm. Cutting the blade across my palm, my eyes watched the blood pool. Drawing a powerful protection spell on the wall, the house rattled the moment I slammed my palm onto the wall. A golden dome hummed to life around the house. Mouthing a silent spell, five necklaces appeared in my palms. Golden feathers dangled off of the golden chains, no words being said as I passed them out.
“These will protect you when you leave the house.” I informed them with my real smile, dropping the necklace over the little girl’s head. “This should increase your ability to become invisible.” Clearing her throat, she stood in the attention position. Holding her head up high, Demy grinned at her proud stance.
“I am Lavender.” She introduced herself boldly, cupping my hands. “I vow to be your ally.” Chuckling softly to myself, my hand fell to my stomach absentmindedly. Hoping my kid was this awesome, hope glittered in her eyes. Demy spun me on my heels, placing my necklace over my head. Hooking his elbow in mine, he glanced back with concern.
“We are going to pick up some grub. Is pizza okay?” He asked with his crooked grin, their heads nodding. “We will be right back.” Guiding me out the door, our neighbors stared at us long and hard. Waving to them, they waved back awkwardly. Letting the moonlight bathe me, he spun me around. Holding me by the small of my waist, scarlet colored my cheeks.
“Did you see that adorable little girl? Do you think ours will be as awesome?” He mused playfully, kissing my lips feverishly. A goofy look dawned on my face, the feather necklace I made glittered on his shirt. Following my gaze, he fiddled with the magical charm.
“I would be a fool not to wear what my wife made for me.” He continued happily, his hand sliding down to my slight bump. Getting onto his knees, his lips brushed against the surface. Hugging my bump, a deeper crimson rose to my cheeks. People watched with warm smiles, the older couples holding each other tighter. Rising to his feet, he hooked his elbow in mine. Making me feel like the lead in a romance novel, pride swelled in his eyes. Walking me to the local pizza place, a warmth came over me. A shadow figure darted in the distance, the serenity leaving my mind. What the hell was that?