Ranfranz and vine funeral home obituaries

I’ve just started sharing this openly, so I wanted to post it here. You all have been such a tremendous support for me!
Two years ago, I buried my niece barely 2 months past her 20th birthday. It was the first closed casket funeral I had ever attended and it broke me.
In my culture, one of the most important parts of the grieving process is viewing the body once the soul has left. This piece is so important that we schedule viewing time hours before the funeral, we walk in and move through the chapel clockwise (in the direction of the sun). Life is full circle.
My niece had been missing for a week. She and I had sat together at her grandpa’s funeral a couple weeks prior, and she had been partying since. Her going missing while partying had never happened before.
Rumors swirled- her bf at the time was heard calling her a heroin whore (he also brought his baby momma to her funeral and flirted with her the whole time). The law enforcement coordinator picked her up without cause that night and never filed a report on it (they were later fired when their background check came back). And, finally, that she did it herself. Her obituary was written from this perspective, and it still sits there. A constant reminder of how many of her own people were willing to believe that. (I did not, and was called a crazy lady for it- ostracized for distracting from “council business”)
Last summer, they arrested a council member’s brother. Apparently, he told his lady about some women he “made disappear”, she went to the cops, and a pattern of behavior emerged. They revisited my niece’s file and determined that actually it was a rape and murder. Forgive me, but whoever was responsible for making the decision to call it a “probable suicide” when their was evidence of SA (they gathered DNA!), I hope you rot in hell because that’s nicer than wishing this kind of loss and pain on anyone.
Sometimes, no matter how hard you work, how much you try to be there, get involved, ask the right questions, you realize that the obstacles placed in front of you are designed to prevent change and action. This script was already written.
The man who was arrested has been charged with 2 murders, neither my niece (or the other woman he “made disappear”). Exhuming a body requires full corporation support (I.e. a 100% yes vote), and they don’t have it. The sibling of this man is now president of the council.
So, here I am. A leader in the MMIP movement, struggling to find solace in a place devoid of any kind of justice. Struggling to find my voice again when screaming feels easier. Struggling to find peace, still, when the excuses of law enforcement and the justice system would try to fill my heart with hate. The violence and trauma inflicted upon my tribe is difficult to navigate, treacherous for our children.
People used to ask me why I was so involved, and I would talk about our suicide rate, how often we face police brutality, how law enforcement’s first responsibility should be to protect the tribal people of this land.
Smallpox, decimation of the land and ecosystems with unchecked over-hunting, railway expansion, forced relocation, slavery, boarding schools, government or church funded child trafficking, full-scale genocide. We are the descendants of those who survived despite repeated attempts at erasure. Our birthright is to stand tall, fist to the sky. 17,000 years of warriors on my back every time I do.
You will NOT erase my niece. She is right here, with me always. She is beautiful inside and out.
Now, when people ask about my involvement, I say “I am here because of love”. I smile. Few understand in the moment, other than those impacted. I am there for them as much as they are for me. Sometimes, it is just that simple.
Native woman, snow lioness, you are the rainbow in my retina. Auntie loves you so much, baby girl ❤️

Hungarian szőlő \ szőllő ‘grape(vine)’, szőlőszem ‘grape’ are from Chuvash śyrla < Turkic *yidge- ‘(blue)berry’. This optional treatment of *-rl- fits csobolyó \ csobolya \ csorboló \ csoborló ‘shallow keg / small round wooden vessel for watewine’ < *c’ump(l)V(lV) ‘drinking vessel’ https://www.reddit.com/usestlatos/comments/12282lq/uralic_languages_and_pie/ . Since Hn. szőlőszem resembles Ossetic sënëfsyr ‘grapes’, a loan is likely. Hn. szëmérëm from Iranian *ǝvsarǝma- shows that v and m can alternate https://www.reddit.com/hungarian/comments/12r8r2b/hungarian_sz%C3%ABm%C3%A9r%C3%ABm_from_iranian_%C7%9Dvsar%C7%9Dma/ , but since szőlőszem seems to be a compound of szem ‘eye / round object’ < *silmä this loan would be from Hungarian.
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It also would have taken place before the change of -lm- > -m- (since -m- > -v- but -lm- > -m-, this would indicate variation of some sort (maybe dialects) in prehistoric Hungarian), so something like *sërlë-sïlva > *sërlë-sïnva (dissimilation of l-l) > *sënëv-sïrla > sënëfsyr. It’s unclear when in this chain the loan would have occurred. The presence of *-rl- in Iranian is consistent with my theory that *kurla-āwya- ‘egg-home’ > Skt. kulā́ya- ‘nest’, Iran. *kulāwa- > Kurdish kulāw https://www.reddit.com/Pashtun/comments/128y1hh/pashto_k_entries_by_georg_morgenstierne/ .
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This direction of borrowing also raises questions about whether szëdër was a loan from Ossetic https://www.reddit.com/hungarian/comments/1291y6h/hungarian_sz%C3%ABd%C3%ABr_blackberry/ . Since szëdër has many likely Uralic cognates while Ossetic does not closely resemble possible Iranian cognates, a native source seems likely. Of course, the similarities of both sets could still be due to common origin, especially if I’m right in seeing Uralic as a branch of Indo-European.
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I would like to apologize in advance, I’m a newer redditor and brand new to this incoming blackout and super anxious about it.
Many subreddits will be going dark in petition of the API pricing policy changes, and some apps have stated they will shut down altogether on June 30th. While I am in agreement with this protest since our voices need to be heard amongst this world of greedy corporations, I do have my concerns. This is my first time doing anything like this. What is the general protocol when something like this happens? Is there anyone who is more experienced with these blackouts able to reach out and guide me on what to prepare when these subreddits that I frequent go down? I am extremely worried and can hardly sleep at night. I’m only getting one, maybe two hours of sleep if I’m lucky. My performance at work is taking a drastic hit and because of the deficiency of sleep, I have constant mood swings. I don’t qualify for insurance for healthcare so I can’t exactly visit my local primary physician for help. All of my income goes to my increased rent and inflated food prices. The start of this month has already been rough for me. I’ve lost my hat, had to replace my worn-down shoes and my apple smart watch broke. This API blackout is just another issue added to my stress. Can any locals show me the ropes and help calm my nerves? Everywhere I go, I use reddit. My livelihood depends on it. I am shaking, getting light headed, and sweating myself as I’m typing this.
I’ve been hearing more and more reports of people leaving reddit altogether. They will be deleting all of their comments and posts before closing their accounts. Should I screenshot my favorite posts and put together a printed photo album when I want to go back to revisit some things?
I am mainly looking for information if anyone has advice on what to prep ahead of this blackout. We will not have any access to news, issues and events happening in our city when reddit goes dark. I imagine that traffic will be even worse than it already is because people will no longer be at home, on reddit. Combining that with speeders, slow people on the left lane, vehicles without their lights on in the rain and tailgaters.
Before you all brigade me for being a moron by asking what to prep and to “google it”, it was the first thing I did and I have some notes on hand. Just looking for the veterans to provide their wisdom and insight. Please stop the hate and be respectful. Reddit IS the front page of the internet.
I already have a few essentials such as a yearlong subscription to my local newspaper, bottled water that is not Zephyrhills or nestle, toilet paper, canned goods, portable AM/FM radio, an OLED Nintendo Switch™ with BOTW/TOTK including a battery recharge pack, candles, lenovo legion gaming pc for Diablo IV, lighters, tarp, sandbags, generator and most importantly, some pubsubs but there is no telling what will really happen until you actually experience it. Should I withdraw some cash on hand? How much? What will my reddit coins be worth? I made a regretful mistake recently of purchasing a very expensive reddit avatar nft as well and can’t refund it. I have some memes already printed out (majesty building mostly) and some printouts to simulate new posts like inadequate driving, traffic, i-4, what internet provider, BEST pizza/burgers/wings, epass or sunpass, hidden gems in Orlando, going to the theme parks will it rain, police/helicopter activity anyone know what is going on?
Discord is not an option for me. I’ve tried using discord and their pro nitro version but it isn’t the same as reddit. There are no orange upvote arrows, or karma and you have to jump through many loopholes to unlock different channels that I don’t have the mental capacity to learn. I joined the local gaming one and some user named rat mother personally banished me afterwards since they had a vendetta against me because I don’t understand reaction face emotes. So now I can’t even find friends to game with and play solo. I have not experienced this much toxicity since the days of ranked league of legends.
This is all just too sudden to go cold turkey from this subreddit with no warning. Will emergency services be open? What are the early signs of withdraw? Will Disney be open? Universal Studios Islands of Adventure? Does anyone realistically know where to specially get discounted tickets?
I do not have reddit gold/platinum at this time but will services restore to those who have those VIP features earlier than those who don’t have it? Or is it amount of reddit karma based? People who want to be ignorant and rude by saying “touch grass” need not comment. I have a medical condition that makes me severely allergic to organic wildlife matter. When you selected your starter Pokémon did you pick Bulbasaur? No, you did not touch grass. You went with Charmander or Squirtle. A lot of you might laugh and not take this seriously but I am a reddit pro power user. 93% of my phone’s battery app usage is for reddit and I upgraded my gaming pc to the 4090 for reddit. We all have our passions and hobbies and there is no need to shame others for theirs.
I’ve survived the hurricanes, the recession, pandemic and inflation. The death of vine, decline of digg, and the change from micro-usb. I don’t think I have the strength, the faith, nor the willpower strong enough to push through this blackout. Orlando is my home, my city. I was born and raised here. Even if we all leave this subreddit Orlando will still be with me, forever and always just like those who moved here from New York. They too, are Local and FLGrown. But it also begs the question on where Orlando Weekly will steal content posts next?
In the aftermath of all of this, will we all be the same person going in to this blackout as we are coming out? I have concerns that I won’t be “me” anymore. Who will take responsibility and be accountable for this emotional yet spiritual awakening traumatic event? The moderators?
[Edit] Thanks for the gold kind stranger! This is the way. The narwhal bacons at midnight (for those of you who are true redditors).

I 28F and my husband 31M have two children 2F (disabled with a very rare genetic condition) and 6M (recently diagnosed with Aspergers and ADHD). This is going to be long since there's a lot of history going back 6 years.
Since the first child was born I have been unable to live peacefully with my inlaws. They were pushy, judgmental and always trying to interfere in the way we raise our son and trying to order us to do things their way. Husband didn't see anything wrong with it since he was raised like this his whole life. It was the reason for many arguments. When 6M was 2yo we moved closer to them, because my husband insisted we move back home and after many discussions I finally agreed. It was rocky at first, but we managed to exist close to each other without any major incidents. A while later we got pregnant. They were hoping for a girl since there hasn't been any girls in the family for two generations. When she was born we were all shocked when she was immediately transferred to ICU due to severe health problems. That's when FIL told us he FORBIDS US to have anymore children (we weren't planning to have anymore anyway but who is he to tell us that). For the past two years my daughter was admitted to hospitals over 20 times. She doesn't sit, doesn't walk. Only recently started to roll over. We have finally learned of the diagnosis a few months ago. Her genetic condition is very rare, less than 20 people diagnosed worldwide. She will never be Independent and will always rely on our care. She's fed through gastrosomy, is only able to make a few sounds and probably will never speak. If she will walk it will be very late, possibly at the age of 7, but there's no guarantees she ever will. My inlaws have this weird fantasy world where they believe that she will miraculously get better. It's fine, if it's their way of coping I'm not the one to judge. The issue is they have never liked me and its showing in their treatment of my children. They have two grandsons from BIL and his wife (their favourite DIL) and they go out of their way to spend time with them. The boys stay for a sleepover at least 3 nights a month, they look after them at least 4 days out of the week, take them for walks and spend as much time as they can with them. With our son they refused to have him overnight (as is their right, it was my husband asking anyway, I'm chill either way) but they also don't go out of their way to spend time with him and only see him when we go over to their house which is not very often due to our disagreements. If ocassionally they did spend time with our son they always complained about him. He doesn't want to eat, his cousins like to eat. He's doing this wrong, that wrong. His cousins aren't like this. Always comparing. Their relationship with our daughter is also reliant on our efforts. They do talk to her, hug her etc. when we are over but also don't unconvenience themselves by seeking any contact on their own. They always said reach out if you need any help but always conveniently have an excuse why they can't help whenever I asked. They have their own company, they always find time to help BIL with his children but never can help with ours. For easter they asked to take our son to the seaside. They asked to take him 2 years ago but changed their minds when we went away with them a month before because they saw that he can be a handful when away from home. This time they were set on taking him and they took our son and BIL's sons for 3 days. After they came back MIL came over to our house furious. She started screaming at me telling me how our son was behaving (and from what she said I'm not defending him, he gave them a front row show of his worst qualities but we warned them that this could happen. She also admitted she didn't give him his morning dose of calming medicine, only the night dose which definitely didn't help). She kept screaming that our son is spoilt. That his behavior is 20% his condition and 80% bad raising on my part. She was furious because son kept crying that he only wanted mum because I'm the only one who understands him and he begged them not to call his dad. I told her I'm not responsible for his relationship with dad. That its hard to expect anything else since my husband doesn't spend time with him, is hardly ever home and he only keeps reprimanding him and complaining at his behavior while playing with our daughter, hugging her and telling her how much he loves her. I told her I'm also struggling and son is not an angel with me, but I'm trying my best. She then screamed that she doesn't blame my husband for being like this and that he should work more and spent less time with us. She also said that I HAVE TO change how I raise my son because he will grow up and beat me up. That I shouldn't ask his opinion on things. That when I tell him to do something and he asks why I should say because I told you so. That I shouldn't talk to him so much and I shouldn't follow the advice that son's psychologist is giving me because she's not the one raising him and dealing with him. She also admitted that while away, my son hit his cousins and she spanked him and he said it didn't hurt. And this excuse for a grandma then said she took a tree branch and hit my son with it. I saw red. Didn't want to argue so I got up to go for a smoke to cool off. She then screamed STOP. GET BACK HERE. I'M TALKING TO YOU. I said I'm going for a smoke because I'm angry and don't want to say too much or argue. She then continued to scream at me and saying to come back and listen to her. I ignored her and went for a smoke. My husband was sat down during this conversation and didn't say anything the whole time. He just kept nodding at her words. This was a fuse in my relationship with husband. I was hurt because he never stands up to his parents. Because if I stand up to them, he's mad at me because "I don't respect them". Because he's more invested in his relationship with his parents than with me and our kids. The atmosphere in our house was tight for a few weeks and shit hit the fan after a while. He was drunk and started to unload on me for going to my future SIL's hen party and leaving the kids with him (I went away for 36 hours for the first time since we've had kids. The only other time I went away was before I was pregnant our daughter to my grandmothers funeral because my husband decided to stay with our son last minute since he was developing a fever). He said many many hurtful things implicating I'm a bad mother. Was very aggressive and intimidating. I packed up my things the next day and went to stay with my sister. When I was safely at her house with the kids I let him know I was leaving him. I refused to answer his phone calls since he was drunk and I knew that because I kept in touch with his grandmother. The next day I let him speak to our son and sent him pics of the children. He asked to come over to talk things out and I agreed. We talked in the car. He admitted he was wrong for his behavior, apologised. He said what's been bugging him, I said what's been bugging me. We agreed that I'll take a few more days to think things through. Finally we had a long conversation and I agreed to try and work things out on the condition that he puts more effort into our relationship and his relationship with our son and puts me and the children first instead of his parents. We came back. That's when his parents announced to husband that they're mad at me and won't talk to me anymore. Why? Because I left. And they won't talk to me until I apologise. I have to admit, my husband kept his promise. He told them I have nothing to apologise to them for. Me leaving doesn't have anything to do with them and I won't be apologising. He was furious when telling me about it. Soon after they were organising a birthday party for husbands uncle and MIL said that she's inviting us all but if I have half a mind I won't come. Husband said in that case not to expect him either. MIL said to at least bring the kids over and he agreed. He didn't end up taking them, because our daughters nurse called that morning to say that she'll be over in the afternoon and I said I'm not comfortable with him leaving the kids with inlaws once the party is in full mode because his family will be drunk and loud by then (they're known to get drunk on occassions like this). He agreed. A few days later MIL asked to take husband and kids to a botanical garden for mothers day or at least the kids, but then corrected herself and said that she would only want to take our son since she can't take care of our daughter (it's not complicated. MIL keeps saying she needs to learn since daughter was born but never showed any interest in learning. Daughter is 2 now and she doesn't put any effort in learning how to take care of her, she also doesn't put any effort to learn how to deal with our son or learning anything about Aspergers. She expects our son to bend his behavior towards her expectations, instead of finding ways to find a common language with him). Husband said he'll think about it. I objected. It's mothers day, I want to spend time with my kids. My husband is welcome to go. They didn't go. Since then MIL coincidentally only insists that husband comes over with the children at dates that are significant to me. Husband takes the children over to them so they can spend time with them on normal dates, that don't interfere with our plans. Yesterday husband said SIL was complaining that its been ages since we've spent time as a family with inlaws. That I should apologise and end this feud. She said she jumped at FIL and hit him and apologised and its all good, so she's sure that things will go back to normal if I apologise. He said that I don't have to apologise but should go over with him and show that I'm willing to end this. The thing is I'm not. It's a few years of built up anger spilling over and me taking a stand for the first time. I refuse to be treated like this. I refuse to be the hated DIL, just because I have different views while BIL's wife assaulted FIL gave a half assed apology and she's back to being their favourite DIL. I refuse to let them treat our kids worse because they don't like their mother. I refuse to bend over backwards to please them, while they treat me and my kids worse. I pointed out to husband that our neughbour has a better relationship with our daughter than MIL. That she's not scared and puts more effort to build a relationship with our daughter than his mother does. That his parents only complain and insist that HE comes over with the kids. That I'm not holding the kids hostage. She can come over and take the kids for a walk, she doesn't have to talk to me. That even when SIL assaulted FIL and they refused to speak to her, they still found a way to spend time with their kids, but can't do the same for our kids. I'm tired of this. I will not go over, I will not speak to them because if I do, it will be same as giving them permission for this treatment. I said they don't have to like me, but should respect that I'm his wife and the mother of his children. That even if they don't like me, our children are their grandchildren and they should treat our kids better and most importantly put our kids first over any arguments or feuds that they have with me. We deserve better and I'm taking a stand for me and my children. He dropped it for now but I know he will try to convince me to end this again.

We found my mum last Tuesday. We think she had been there for a couple days. (She often went AWOL when she was sick, and she had multiple health issues. Usually no big deal.) but the lack of closure has me torn apart.
The coroner found nothing in the post mortem. We need to wait for the pathologist which could take 6 weeks. The funeral home say she’s too far gone to see her - I can’t give her that hug I desperately, desperately want to give her. I didn’t get to say goodbye. I still won’t. I don’t know what took her from me, perhaps I never will. We had a complicated couple of years but that was my fucking mother. My heart is in pieces and I don’t know how I’m going to be able to carry on. I suffer with severe mental health issues and I was making amazing strides in the last 6 months after my partners grandpa died (we lived with him and cared for him 24/7 - also I lost 2 dogs and an uncle last year) and this has sent my mental health PLUMMETING. We also think her friend has found her and done nothing as he never asks us to go check on her but did this time, and he knew things only we did about the house at the time. He could have tried to save her.
I’m already on the waiting list for therapy. But this hurts more than words can say. I am dreading every second more I have to go without answers. I’m forgetting to eat, barely sleeping properly. I’ve lost weight already.
Has anyone else gone through this? How the hell do I do this?

For context, my grandad was very ill (I call him papa) for many years, he had copd and prostate cancer and has been bed bound for the past 2 years, but his mind was always active.
I grew up in a dysfunctional home with a narcissistic mother, a step dad and half brother, I was the black sheep in that household and my safe place was with my gran and papa. I’m the oldest of 5 grandchildren f(23)
My papa bought me my first car, my first year at university accommodation, my car insurance… gave me everything, saved me from my biological dad when he stole me, texted me everyday to check on me, ALWAUS looked out for me and defended me I was so lucky. He was the dad I never had.
He gave me everything and reminded me everyday how proud he was of me. He healed something in me that my mum took away from me and he made me feel safe and told me as long as he’s here I’d never be stuck.
Since I was a little girl, my papa was my safe person, he taught me how to type in a computer and how to ride a bike, even last week he video called me teaching me how to put up wall paper.
Yesterday I held his hand while he took his last breathe.
I feel so alone I feel so angry I feel robbed I feel abandoned
My mum never let me go to the funeral directors, she didn’t let me watch my papa be taken out the house, she’s insulted me constantly infront of people and she’s making me feel even more abandoned
What’s next?
How am I supposed to live the rest of my life without my safe place

My(24f) Husbands(25m) uncle (FIL’s brother) passed away 3 years ago. His family didn’t have a funeral, The uncle had mental health issues so he didn’t have anyone in his life outside of immediate family and myself. In February of this year we get this random text that on June 3(no significance to this date) there’s going to be a funeral for him in Ohio. We agreed to go(it’s only 3 hours away from us and we would be back home that night) even though it’s really weird this is happening almost 3 years later on an insignificant date. We agreed to go despite our feelings of it being 3 years later strictly out of respect for FIL.
In March, we went on a trip to Virginia for a wedding and we stayed with his parents. His dad brought up that he’s booking an Airbnb for the funeral and we have to stay with them. This was ignored by both my husband and I since our dog has been having these weird stomach problems(she’s mostly back to normal now) and our pet sitter had to clean up shit and bathe her for 2 days. It kept getting worse she couldn’t stop throwing up or control her bowel movements. We left our trip early while our angel of a pet sitter stayed with her until we got home. At this point with us leaving early, FIL is upset because he wanted us to spend the night in Ohio, and he was trying to book an Airbnb, even though we never agreed to that and he was like “oh, I guess I shouldn’t have asked for that given the circumstances with the dog”. 24 hours later, he still booked the Airbnb.
Anyway, so throughout April and May our dog was still having these issues where we couldn’t leave the house for more than eight hours without her having uncontrollable diarrhea/vomit for multiple days. My husband tells his mother that we’re not gonna be able to spend the night because of our dog and we don’t want our pet sitter to have to deal with what he went through in March again because that would not be fair to him and not fair to the dog to lay in her own shit overnight. MIL just started screaming at husband on the phone saying that “this is funeral more important than our dog and we should have our pet sitter watch her so we can stay the night with them and be a family.” This controversial conversation went on for weeks until they finally let up on our decision to prioritize our dogs health. This past Friday, inlaws dog ended up needing emergency surgery. So they had to reschedule this funeral, which is okay however we’re moving back to to our home state in the south in a few weeks and we have a lot going on. I suggested the first weekend of July if they want us to be able to come this summer, but that doesn’t work for them because there’s gonna be traffic and they have a vacation the second week of July. I also suggested a date in two weeks from now and heard crickets. They decided that we weren’t going to go and they decided on a date where I said that my mom I haven’t seen in six months(she just became a flight attendant and it’s the only days she has off she will be flying from Detroit to see me and then back to Detroit for work) is coming to visit and help me pack and husband didn’t want to takeoff of work for this 3 year late funeral as the emotions/urgency has been gone since then. Husband gets screamed at by his mother saying how important this is to his dad and just going off on him and suggesting my husband just leaves me at home and he comes. Then SIL(22f) calls and screams at him that this is important and my “plans are bullshit and everyone is saying it’s bullshit”. They get into it but nothing is resolved. FIL and Ben were chatting about other dates on the phone and SIL comes in screaming because she has a babysitting job on a Friday/Thursday that would work. That phone call ends abruptly and MIL calls husband to scream at him and then the FIL and SIL chime in to start screaming at him to leave me at home and why can’t I be left alone with my mom(my mom was coming to visit with both of us and help us) and why can’t I pack by myself(I have pretty bad health issues). I finally yelled in their presence for the first time “I don’t fucking care anymore just go without me so SIL can go to her fucking babysitting job I don’t even want to go anymore” then they all shut the fuck up and I pretended to leave the room and then SIL starts crying on the phone & now everyone is upset. Next day FIL calls husband and said he understands if husband doesn’t come as my feelings were extremely hurt and this is an open wound they keep opening. Alright so, husband called FIL (who said previously he understands if Ben doesn’t go to stand by me) to tell FIL he’s not going and FIL started screaming at my husband. Apparently they are all offended/embarrassed I yelled obscenities at SIL. After that, my husband was upset and said he has to go to this funeral, I agreed but I’m still upset over how I have been treated like a pet you can just leave at home. Anyways I ended up calling FIL and told him how I feel, it was going okay but then he was saying he doesn’t let his children cuss at eachother and then he randomly asked if my father deceased 10 years ago) allowed that and I stated that my dad encouraged us to fight it out and get over it. He then said that SIL apologized. In my head, I was like to what the wind? I left the room. He was almost insinuating I need to apologize and I stated that I would not be apologizing. He then asked if I wanted to be treated like his daughter because if I want that that means he would tell me to get over it and I would have to come to the funeral regardless of my plans. Found that comment to be bizarre as he’s not my father nor my fathers replacement. MIL had tried calling me that day but I didn’t answer bc I am not in the right headspace and he told me he would’ve told me to pick up the damn phone if I was his daughter…. But I’m not your daughter I’m an adult who’s married to your son. Anyways that phone call ended with me saying I need to be left alone right now and he agreed.
MIL texted me afterwards saying she’s upset and wants to talk to me. Husband called inlaws and was pissed that she texted me. I responded to her with “I am not ready to talk right now cause my emotions are high as well and I want to be able to have a productive conversation with you.”
Anyways fast forward to yesterday MIL said to husband on a phone call that she doesn’t understand why I am offended/hurt. He explained that I am his wife, I was one of the few people that knew his uncle outside of family and they have disrespected me multiple times previously in similar situations. Husband told me he explained to MIL his priorities were with me and she apparently said ”what if your priorities change” and also said “well you’re going without her now anyways so why is she upset”
This has been exhausting. Of course if this death had recently happened, we would both drop anything and everything for it but as it can be rescheduled, I’m not understanding why it has to be a specific time that ONLY works for them.

I have a feeling I know what people will tell me and that I wont like what they have to say but I need at the very least to write this out and express my feelings.
So I've had trauma and depression since childhood and in my 20's I abused alcohol and drugs [mostly psychedelics' and some xanax], I had horrible depression. At times I couldnt really see colour or taste food, at times my drinking was so bad I barely ate. Very unstable. Frankly the only reason I didnt end up homeless or dead was that I happened to know other traumatized alcoholics and drug addicts and we co dependently saw eachother through the hard times. My best friend in that particular category overdosed just after the pandemic and that was that. I have poor relations with my family [I do talk to one sister] and only a couple friends left. Those friends are actually pretty stable, though one has kind of a drinking problem as I do.
I went into a pre apprentice trades program as part of Welfare; most of the participants are ex criminals or addicts. I met a girl. She was extroverted, wild, friendly, still using too much coke and things like that but on anti depressants, resolute to raise her son and get him back, stay away from criminals and stay away from the drug trade. For someone whos only ambition was to sleep as much as I could for as long as I could, the fact that she wants a red seal for carpentry and wants to open up a shelter for abused children really impressed me, it made me admire her even. We both had similar backgrounds in that respect only she had a far worse life and still wanted and wants a normal one. Maybe im just desperate and lonely but it really hit me to meet someone I liked who I understood who impressed me.
Anyway; during the program we gradually became friends. Not the best of friends, just friends. And she would flirt with me some as well-- as I said a wild girl so its hard to interpret the flirting, and she said she wanted no man just to raise her son. most of her friends are guys. She wanted to hang out and do shrooms but I was busy, so I invited her over a while later and she accepted. But she got depressed on the weekend and never came down; we continued to hang out but she flirted noticably less. Honestly her friend had just died and a lot of other friends in jail and to be frank I was probably being a self absorbed asshole even to invite her down, but I was excited to see her. About a week ago she got full custody of her kid back and is therefore very busy and mentioned it.
After that the program went online mostly, and she skipped a few days for the funeral and drinking, things like that. I ran into her again on the last day and as we had done previously we hung out with eachother most of the day. We ate lunch (where to give an indication of the relationship in some way; were close enough that while waiting for the food she rested her head on my shoulder and I wrapped my arm around her] grabbed some booze and drank for a couple hours. I asked her if she ever wanted to hang out after the program and she paused for a second to think and then answered: "sure, we both live in the same city unlike those other wackos, we can hang out. but id probably have to bring my son along" Not a word for word accurate quote but its close enough. So right there I, in all honesty from a point of self consciousness, am not sure how to take that. Hesitating because she didnt want to? hesitating because she was thinking out the structure of her life? my impression of her is always that shes fond of me and a very open person, but I make bad decisions and calls. So to my ear saying 'my son might be there' is an honest concession to the fact that shes a single mom and in a sense the willingness to hang out with me and her son is a good sign, yes? But I cant get it out of my head its a bad one.
This is where I am quite embarrassed: The last time we drank together this girl got way too drunk and ended up pissing in some water cups and throwing them out the window of the bus. She didnt get in trouble cause she was further to the back, it all worked out. Yesterday on said bus though I was the one who was way too drunk [and a bit high on coke] and so I pissed into a water bottle-- which I slightly overfilled because it was hard to judge and a bit of piss was on the cap, which I then tightened and threw out the window lol. Ofc the bus driver noticed because im a dumb fuck, and kicked me and the girl off the bus -- at least I think thats what happened, I know we both left but in all honesty my memory is sketchy and I wasnt paying attention.
Long story short im pretty sure I heard the girl say something like 'you got some piss on me' holy fuck my soul shattered into a million pieces. Again as a preface; she seems non judgmental and is more than a little crazy-- drugs, things like that. She burned her arm with cigarettes the other day just as a dare to see who could withstand more pain between her and her friend. So I honestly have NO idea how something like that would be received. A regular person absolutely would call me fucking pathetic [trust me...I know im pathetic] and would want nothing to do with me after that. Maybe shes different?
On the way back home stumbling drunk I texted her 'your cool, text me if you ever wanna hang out' and no reply. Again she just got her kid back and has been saying shes too busy to text people-- she even had an argument with someone who thought he was being ghosted.
Honestly what the fuck do I do:
-I cant stop going over this in my head and tearing myself apart. I really liked her and I feel like I shot myself in the foot to the point where I cant salvage it. The programs over and im honestly not even sure how I can communicate with her. Should I apologize? Do I call her up? Should I wait a few days?
-I am if im being completely honest interested in dating her--- but I dont want to be, because she said she just wanted friends, and I do want to be her friend, and I dont want to be that fucking dishonest simp asshole whos resenting her and sitting on the sidelines. I want the crush to go away because she seems like someone I could be best friends with
-I am also aware that line of reasoning sounds precariously like I love her or something, and im not sure if the feelings will go away
-I'm also just not sure if shes good for me or im good for her. I know that since ive met her ive enjoyed waking up and most of my instincts and things I do are shared with her, and I always have felt like a wild fucking loser who no one understood
-All ive done today is walk around trying to distract myself from this.
-Assuming she isnt mad at me and im just neurotic and mentally ill [definitely]; then how or what should I do in going about hanging out with her? I've never been an adult before, only a drunken loser and a petty thief. Is the subtext of hanging out with a woman and her kid that its a date? Should I just ask a generic thing like 'do you wanna drink and hang out?'
Or maybe im just barking up the wrong tree and shes not even very interested me as a friend, I donno.
​
*To be clear she is not 'using' again-- this might sound dishonest and it might even have an element of dishonesty but its true. Sometimes alcoholics can drink without returning to drinking, doesnt mean there isnt substantial risk or that they will always drink responsibly (clearly I did not) but the act of drinking in and of itself doesnt mean im going to fall back into chronic use. The same goes for her, she uses coke and she shouldnt and its a risk she will fall back into being a coke head, but dont get the wrong impression. Shes mostly sober and im mostly not drinking.

Does anyone know how to get out of a Starbucks contract?
I just started my new job and I already want to quit. I REALLY want to quit. Because this shit isn’t normal. I mean, is it? Do you guys have experience with this type of shit, or is it a normal thing when moving to the city? I’m a small-town girl so I’m not used to this. We didn’t even have a Starbucks. Just a diner that had been broken into multiple times over the years.
Do you know the bad feeling you get when something bad is going to happen, but you ignore it for the sake of staying sane? .Yeah.
It was one of those situations.
But I needed cash. I needed a job. College in the city is expensive, especially in my mid-twenties. Uber Eats every night and various subscriptions, such as Netflix and Spotify—as well as basic living needs required cash. So, naturally, I looked for part-time jobs I could use to fill up my weekend and nights. When it came to job hunting, I was fairly lazy. So, the Starbucks job kinda came out of nowhere.
I wasn’t even looking for it. I was applying for a job in the local music store when it caught my eye. Someone to work late evenings and nights on weekdays and Saturdays. The job description didn’t say much, just basic pay details and a full paragraph dedicated to talking about “The Starbucks Family”. Skim reading it, I skipped to the APPLY NOW button and sent in my resume via email. Two hours.
It had taken two hours to get an email back offering a video interview the next day—and a guaranteed job if I didn’t screw it up. The video interview went well to my surprise. The woman who conducted it acted more like a friend, asking me what my favorite movies and TV shows were, and then going into detail about her own.
It didn’t even feel like an interview. More like a chat. Which was exactly what the email said it was going to be. The interviewer was my mom’s age, a total mom-like persona. She offered me iced tea before laughing and realizing we were on a video call. Her cat popped up halfway through her introducing several staff members by name. A large tabby whom she picked up and hugged to her chest. I wasn’t sure what to do except repeatedly say, “Aww.” and force an even bigger smile.
The woman who for some reason did not introduce herself finished the interview with a more formal and thorough talk-through of rules and regulations. Which went in one ear and out the other. I think I was too excited about the job as a whole. There’s something almost mythical about working at Starbucks. I’ve seen barista TikTok complaining about customer service and harping about in the back rooms. It looked fun. Plus, free drinks? I figured working at the famous coffee chain would at least have benefits and freebies.
The woman spoke to me for almost two hours about certain drinks, telling me I would be trained up, and then going on to explain the dos and don’ts in a working environment. It was kind of patronizing, but I figured she had to be to remain professional. I tuned out when she started talking about a certain “feud” they had with another store down the road. The woman didn’t go into detail, but her expression did darken significantly when she leaned closer to her screen and repeated the phrase, “Do you understand me?” I had to backtrack and try and go over what she had been saying, but I had found myself mesmerized by the gilded sword in the background. It hung from the back wall in all of its glory, and I was having a hard time trying to figure out why exactly a Starbucks manager had a sword hanging from her wall.
“Sim?” Inclining her head, the manager cleared her throat. “Did you hear me?”
I did. Sort of. Under no circumstances must I visit or go near 2nd Street Starbucks. If I did there would be dire consequences and I would face losing my job, or worse.
I wasn’t sure what “or worse” was, but from the way her expression twisted from funny-cat-lady to a potential employer, I didn’t want to ask.
Yikes.
“Uh, yeah,” I said. “I can’t go near the 2nd Street store.” I almost choked on a glass of water I had been slowly sipping throughout the interview. I had been sweating most of the day, dying in the intense June heat. It was a lot cooler in the evening in the city, but I was used to draining at least ten glasses a day. “Is that real?” I couldn’t help asking, pointing to the sword behind her.
I know you are supposed to maintain a certain professional persona and façade during professional work interviews with potential managers. However, I really wanted to know if that ancient thing was real, it was driving me crazy. Because questions were arising in my head: How did she get it? Was it hers? Was it for some kind of aesthetic and feng-shui, or was there more to it? From the look on the interviewer’s face, she seemed startled.
Whipping her head around, her strict grey ponytail hitting the screen, she nodded before turning back to me, her gaze flicking down to what I presumed was a script she was reading off—or maybe she was skimming through my printed-out resume. I wanted to ask her more about the elephant in the room, but she seemed satisfied with answering my question with a nod. She asked me more questions, mostly about my work ethic and if I enjoyed working in a team and independently, if I had any special requirements, and oddly—if I had ever held a firearm. Now, that caused alarm bells. Along with the gilded sword dangling from this forty-something-year-old’s lounge wall, I was definitely starting to question the exact nature of what I would be doing at this job. Serving coffee was an obvious one, though I was pretty sure Starbucks barista's didn’t require military-style training.
When I didn’t know what to say, she seemed to back-pedal. “Oh, it’s in case of a robbery.” She said. But her expression stayed stoic. Speaking in the tone of being joking, but not being joking. “It is rare. However, it is a precaution we must take.” Choosing her words carefully, the interviewer steepled her hands in front of her face, leaning her chin on her fingers. “Our employees are given basic fire-arm training in the instance that one day we may face a difficult situation. Now, I am not saying it is inevitable, but due to certain behavior throughout the years, it is, of course, better to be safe than sorry.”
“Oh.” I tried to smile. “No, I haven’t,” I paused, hoping my lack of ability to hold a gun wouldn’t screw up my chances. “But I can learn?”
I said it like a question because it was a question. I was questioning myself why exactly I would take up my time learning to shoot a gun I most likely never would need. To my surprise though, the woman’s smile brightened and she looked down at whatever she was writing.
“Of course,” she said. “Sim, I am very happy to hear that. We love employees who do their best to learn and thrive in our working environment,” she paused and typed something on her laptop before her gaze found mine. “I’ll put you down for lessons on Friday mornings. How does that sound?” Before I could answer her—because I was starting to seriously question why she was so obsessed with training me to use a goddamn gun—she was nodding to herself. “I will put Jude in charge of you. I think he is working on Friday, so your induction and welcome can be completed in the morning…”
She trailed off into her own murmured conversation to herself before clearing her throat. I jumped. I didn’t mean to jump, but her whole presence was putting me on edge. The lady had been nicer on the phone, and earlier on in the interview when she was grilling me on which Frozen character was my favorite.
“Okay!” The interviewer gathered up her paperwork, beaming at me through the camera. “Can you start tomorrow? Let’s say…” her eyebrows furrowed together. “5:30? I will not be there for the first hour due to certain obligations,” she traced her lip with the tip of her index. “However, I have four employees working the front desk, I’m sure they will give you a warm welcome.” I noticed something twitch on her lips. It was almost like she was trying to stop herself from laughing—which was childish from a standpoint where I was the younger one, while she was the senior. She was supposed to be setting some kind of standard, and yet for some reason was more inclined in teasing me about workplace friendships, and apparently how “close” my colleagues were. I wasn’t stupid, I knew what friendship was like in the workplace. It’s not “real” because you’re all there to do a job, not making lifelong friendships.
“I’m looking forward to meeting them,” I said when she snorted out a laugh that twisted up my gut.
"Absolutely," she responded. "The team is very close, so don't take it personally if they're initially cautious. I'm confident that you'll all become great friends! Kai is a kind-hearted sweetheart, while Ana may seem standoffish initially, but she'll warm up to you once you get to know her. Jude, on the other hand, will be your guide during the orientation, so it's best to stay close to him. In fact, it's recommended to shadow him during your first few hours since he's our top performer! Frankly, Sim, I can hardly wait for you to meet them! They're a great group!" This woman seemed to suddenly discover the use of expletives, or maybe she had noticed I visibly wanted to crawl into the ground. The way she was describing the other employees, I was expecting cartoon characters when I walked through the door.
“Right,” I said. I was starting to regret applying. “I’ll be there.”
She ended the call with a bright smile, and her stupid cat walking on the keyboard, causing her to squeak out in horror. I shut my laptop, my cheeks burning. Well, that went…? Well? Could I really say it went well when the manager had spent the last five minutes implying my work colleagues were going to hate me? Fuck.
I didn’t want to go. I trashed my application and deleted her number from my phone. But the morning after, however, I came to the quick realization through precious morning caffeine, that I needed cash. So, no matter how much I didn’t want to go—I had to. So, I headed to classes and tried not to think about it. It was 5:34 when I stepped into the familiar glow of the famous store—not before being stopped in the middle of a crowed by a girl wearing bright pink ray-bans and a scowl. “Do you work there?” she turned and pointed to the store.
I shrugged. “I guess.”
She scoffed, slipping off her ray-bans and fixing me with a bitchy smile. “Your funeral.”
Normally, in situations when strangers say odd things to me on the street, I just laugh it off. But this? This seemed personal.
“What?”
The girl didn’t say anything before turning and walking or rather running away.
Well, that was weird.
After that encounter, I was weighing the positives and negatives of taking up the job. The positives would be cash and something to occupy my mind away from classes, and the negatives were being stuck with insufferable colleagues and a manager who was the embodiment of unprofessional. The store was pretty empty when I stepped through automatic doors, reveling in the cooling fan blasting icy cold air in my face. A dark-haired college girl had her back to me, cleaning tables. But I noticed her stiffening up when I took a step forward. She straightened up like a cat going into territorial mode, before relaxing and holding a two-fingered hand up.
The store was empty so I had no idea who she was signaling to. It wasn’t a greeting to me—I had no idea what it was. I was halfway to the counter before a guy popped up out of nowhere, mid-way through drying a cup with a washrag. His hair was the first thing I noticed. Bright red.
In contrast to his pasty skin, this guy would definitely stand out in a crowd. He was my age or maybe a little older, mid twenties, with a wide smile and not much of anything else, kitted in a short-sleeved shirt, and a Starbucks apron over the top.
I expected quirky cartoon-like weirdos and I got an average Joe. I wasn’t complaining.
Initially, I thought this guy was just another jock-like college guy. But looking closer, the friendliness in his eyes wasn’t sincere, and his smile was strained. Keeping up a professional attitude, he regarded me with a smile, leaning across the counter. But his eyes kept flicking to the door in quick succession like he was waiting for a certain someone to come in. “You.” He pointed at me, trailing his finger to the door, swiping hair from his face with his hand. The guy was bouncing on the heels of his toes, I noticed. He couldn’t stand still, like a hyperactive child. “You’re Sim, The newbie I’m supposed to be training.”
I nodded, offering a nervous wave.
“Jude.” He introduced himself, though clearly distracted, his gaze flicking to and from the door. His facade was friendly enough, but very fake. It was the same smile I presumed he flashed at customers who complimented his looks. “Hey, Sim.”
Instead of holding out his hand for me to shake, he folded his arms across his chest. Jude cocked his head, drinking me in before his lips broke out into a beam.
"Shall we get started?"
Jude started the tour, showing me the store itself, then the back, the storage room, the staff room, and bizarrely, a wooden door which he referred to as, “The Drink”. I had no idea what that meant, but I made a mental note to steer away from it.
The backrooms of the store turned into a labyrinth. The place was covered in mold, peeling paint on the doors and old rugged floor tiles. Jude spoke way too fast like he was intentionally trying to confuse me. By the time I was struggling with my apron, he was turning on his heels with a brow raised. “Your hair is too long so you need to tie it up. You can shadow me this evening but don’t get in my way. We have two twenty-minute breaks and during them, we are contractually obligated to go down to the Second Street store and throw eggs at their windows—ooh, and the girl you just met who didn’t say a word? That’s Ana. You will get used to her.” His smile reached a level of fake I didn’t think was possible. “Why don’t you follow me?”
“What?” I managed to hiss out when Jude was leading me down a long, winding corridor that dipped into various rooms, out-of-order elevators, and the creepiest set of stairs I had ever seen leading into the pitch dark. I was still trying to register his words.
Jude twisted around with a frown. “What’s up?” He nodded at a passing blonde girl who shot me a smile, and hive-fived Jude before disappearing through a door.
“You throw eggs at the store down the road?”
The guy’s lip twitched into the start of a smile. He turned around, quickening his pace. “Did I say that? Obviously, I was joking.”
I stumbled after him, knocking into a dark-haired younger guy carrying a tray of cupcakes. He and Jude seemed to exchange words without speaking before Jude gestured to the stranger. Somehow, I figured out their telepathic conversation through eye movements and strained smiles, they weren’t talking about me. “That’s Kai,” Jude said, pushing through the doors back to the main storefront. He took a customer’s order, retaining that stupid smile. “If you need any help with making those annoying TikTok drinks that take a millennia to make and have probably broken several Geneva convention rules?” He playfully knocked into me while preparing a drink, his hands knowing where everything was, preparing and serving a latte in a matter of minutes, “Kai is your guy! He runs our social media page and is practically a connoisseur on the next big trend. He'll deal with zoomers."
I was slowly starting to ease my way into this job, and my colleagues seemed pretty cool. Jude actually helped me all the way through the evening, introducing his home life and how he grew up as he cleaned tables and conversed with the others—always throwing me into their chatting so I didn’t get left out. I ended up sorting through cookies and making price labels with Aurora, the perky blonde who high-fived Jude earlier. She spoke to me like we had been best friends for years, and that part of her charm made me instantly adore her. She was tiny for her age, but a menace when it came to her sharp tongue and language. I didn’t think a tiny thing like her could swear like a goddamn sailor, but it was cute. Jude and Aurora had a sibling-type thing going on, though every time I caught Kai’s eye, he was smirking. It seemed everyone knew they had a thing except them.
I was actually having fun with the others, bobbing my head to the radio while serving a group of kids, when Jude, who was next to me, seemed to go rigid all of a sudden. His laughing smile carved into something else. I had never seen an expression change so fast.
But he wasn’t the only one. Aurora, cleaning tables and giggling at Jude’s joke, straightened up, her eyes flashing to the door. Kai’s head snapped up from where he had been grinding coffee. Following their gaze, I found myself face-to-face with the manager who interviewed me. But unlike the night before, she was not smiling. The woman dropped her bag at the door before marching towards the counter. Jude leaned over; his expression apprehensive.
“Well?”
His eyes as well as his tone had darkened significantly. All of my colleagues had taken off these masks, these facades of joking smiles and bright eyes, and now I was seeing a glimmer of what they were hiding. What Jude had been looking for all evening, sneaking glances at the door. I watched his gaze follow the manager as she paced back and forth, chewing her nails. “Where is he?”
“I don’t know.” She finally said, lifting her head. Her lips were twisted. “But.” She said, spitting each word, as she rounded the counter, helping herself to coffee. “You’re going to pay a visit to them right now, and…and sort this out once and for all.” Her voice resembled that of a mother talking to her children. She was assertive to them, her eyes piercing. Do you understand me?” The woman nodded at Jude. “You can go.” Her eyes found mine. “Take the new girl, she needs to be inducted.” Finally, she turned to Ana, who was standing in the corner silently. “You are too. I need brains, and Jude is just brawn. Keep him on his toes, young lady."
With a hint of sarcasm in his tone, Jude uttered a brief "Thanks," and then proceeded to take a coffee cup and a Sharpie. Swiftly, he scrawled some words on the side of the cup, before placing it inside a bag and plonking it in front of me. As Jude reached for his coat at the back, he put it on over his green Starbucks apron, creating a striking contrast with his denim blue sherpa. With his mop of red curls, this guy was in no way going to be as incognito as he thought. "We'll manage the conversation,” he said hurriedly, visibly excited. Jude seemed to lead the others in their expressions, his confidence and wit causing them to brighten up, adapting wide smiles. He shoved his hands in his pockets, “All you gotta do is hand them this, okay?”
“Is that a good…” Kai drifted off on whatever he was about to say, ducking his head when Jude shot him a glare.
“I think it’s a perfect idea!” The manager beamed at me. “What a way to fully bring you into our family!”
I took the coffee cup (the empty coffee cup) hesitantly. “What is it?”
“It’s a gift!” Jude said, moving towards the door in long strides. It was all too noticeable that this guy was practically vibrating with an energy I had never known. It was almost manic. “I want to let them know we appreciate them! Y’know! Rival to rival.”
Kai stepped in front of him on the way out.
“Be careful,” he said in a low hum. Aurora joined him, but she wasn’t speaking, her left-hand tugging at the waistband of her jeans. “Keep your head down when you go in because they’ll be expecting you—and they’ll be expecting a retaliation.”
“Relaaaaax, it’s Cora! We used to date!” he cocked his head. "I think."
“I mean it. "
Jude’s gaze found mine for a moment before his smile grew. “Well, we have enough eggs don’t we?” He grabbed my arm, pulling me along. Ana was already gone. I could see her figure already slinking down the street, bleeding into the shadow.
When the two of us hit the cool night air and Jude quickened his pace into a power-walk, his eyes set forwards, jaw set, I figured I should ask what his deal was. If this guy was serious about vandalizing a rival Starbucks, and not just that, urged by his manager, then I had to say something.
The thought of ending up in jail being petty over a rival store made me feel nauseous.
“So, what is this about?” I asked, catapulting myself into a half-run to keep up with him. The guy had abnormally long legs, so he was halfway across the sidewalk while I was barely two steps in front. “Aren’t you taking this a little too seriously?”
Jude didn’t reply, instead remarking on the sky being filled with stars.
“Hey, Ana!” He shouted. “Wait up!”
Second Street Starbucks was like walking into a palace. I could tell why these guys were rivals. The place was a three-floored beast, a glass building made up of a Starbucks downstairs, a library, and a private apartment. I found myself mesmerized by the twinkling lights on the door, the mini water fountain through large windows showing an even bigger storefront with rich-looking wooden tables and reclining chairs. The store was closing. When we stepped in front of the door, there was a sign which clearly said CLOSED on the front.
Still, though, Ana pushed her way through it, followed by Jude, pulling me along with him. Two employees were working, a guy with short blondish hair mopping the floors, and a girl standing at the counter, going through the register. The moment we stepped inside, the guy cleaning up stopped mopping from side to side, his fingers visibly tightening around the mop handle. “Hey there!”
With one of his best fake smiles, Jude raised his arms in surrender. “We’re from the Starbucks down the road. We come in peace, don’t worry!” He gestured to me.
“Can we talk to your manager?”
He took a step, his lip twitching, eyes glinting, which caused a stir in the air. The girl at the counter stopped flicking through a wad of cash in her hand and delicately put it down, and the guy turned to face us with wary eyes.
As Jude took another stride forward, his movements resembled a dance, and I noticed he was having fun teasing them. His eyes sparkled with a childlike glee that was unexpected for a person in his twenties. "Would you like to try our latest coffee recipe? It's like sipping on liquid sunshine." He nonchalantly brushed his jeans, and I half-expected him to pull out an egg. “But…” Jude took another step, and Ana situated herself behind the blonde boy, her expression blank. “You’ve already tasted it, haven’t you?”
The girl behind the counter finally stopped counting cash, delicately placing a wad back inside the register before leaning forward, an amused smirk curving on her lips. “Jude.” Her voice was a low murmur. “I didn’t think I would see you here so soon.”
“Cora.” Jude’s lips quirked. “Trust me, I don’t want to be. But hey, it's the boss's orders.”
She inclined her head, her eyes drinking all of him in. The girl rested her fist on her chin. She was surveying him like a piece of meat. “And you obey her?”
His grin widened, and I saw his hand once again brush the front of his apron. “Like a dog.”
“You know her?” I hissed out, grasping hold of the coffee cup in my hand.
“Cora?” Jude turned to me. “Oh yeah, we used to be the Romeo and Juliet of coffee shop rivalry — back when we were both newbies, and our store kidnapped me as a last resort. To keep the peace, I stayed.” He shrugged. “That’s what I’m told, anyway.”
Starbucks lore was getting dark.
These guys had to be joking around.
I took a step back, eager to head towards the door and be as far away as possible from what I was pretty sure was going to be a lot of eggs, and several arrests. “You worked here?” I couldn’t believe my mouth was still moving and forming words as I took slow steps back. Before Jude caught my arm.
“Apparently.” He said, dragging me back by his side. “Why don’t you give ‘em’ their gift?”
Fuck.
Unwrapping the bag and pulling out the cup, I nodded and took slow strides toward the counter, placing it down in front of her.
Cora frowned, before picking it up, her gaze going to the side.
“Go fuck yourself 2nd street bloodsuckers.” She read out loud, her brow raising into her hairline.
Shit.
“I should probably go.” I managed to say, backing away. “I don’t think is the job for me—”
The latter half of my words exploded in my head when something slammed into my ears, a physical force sending me to my knees. Initially, I didn’t know what it was. It sounded like a nuclear bomb had gone off. When the ringing in my head subsided, I was aware I had my head buried in my knees, my hands clamped over my ears.
But when I tried to listen past the relentless shrill ringing in my skull, I heard them one after the other. Pop, pop, pop! Gunshots. The crack of each bullet ricocheted in my skull. It was a robbery, I thought dizzily. We were being robbed. No, Second Street was being robbed. When I lifted my head to try and find Jude and Ana to see if they were okay-- I expected them to be cowering like me, Jude, under the table, muffling yelling into his hand, and Ana, calmly pulling him to safety. But that wasn't what I saw. Instead, I must have been fucking imagining things. Jude had not moved from his spot-- and perfectly melded into his hand, was a gun. A gun he was holding like a pro, his hands wrapped around the butt, index teasing the trigger.
His trajectory was directly between Cora's eyes. Jude had not been the one who shot the gun. In fact, neither had Ana, who was still standing stiffly behind the blonde guy.
It was a girl behind the counter who had come out of nowhere wielding the type of gun I expected to see in movies. I noticed from his stance Jude had maybe stepped to the left and then the right to avoid being hit, but the way his demeanour was fully and completely relaxed sent shivers creeping down my spine. "The deal is off, Cora," he murmured. "You fuck with us, so we fuck with you." he lowered his gun slightly, his eyes darkening. "Where's Ren? He came here to sniff you out, so where is he?"
Cora seemed remarkably calm. She started to raise her hands, her lips forming the words, "I don't know what you're talking about" before she stopped, her body going limp. It took me a disorienting moment to realize Jude had taken the shot, followed by another, both landing right between her eyes. When Cora hit the ground, the whole world around me exploded.
I was dragged to the ground by Jude, as he dived across the floor, pressing himself into the back of a table, twisting around, and taking out the barista who almost shot me in the face. There were five of them, all of them good shooters. Too good. Ana easily took out a blonde and brunette with her own magnum, followed by a bald guy who crashed through the counter which collapsed under him.
Jude fell into a manic shoot-out with a guy who would not give up, and after several attempts, re-loading, and attempting to finish him from the ground, my colleague got tired and stood up, dropped his gun, and leaped across the counter. I didn't know what to watch. Ana, who was destroying their coffee machine, or Jude, who snapped the boy's neck with a single twist of his fingers, before ripping out his eyes. He hauled the dead guy over his knees, grazing his teeth across the pasty flesh of the boy's neck, his eyes flickering. I wouldn’t say they turned a different color, but there was something inhuman about them, a certain tint around his iris. "Urgh."
He shoved the corpse away, jumping up. "He reeks of it." Treading through broken glass and pooling red on the floor, my colleague grabbed a cup, downed it, and then spat it out. “That.” He sputtered. “Is the worst fucking thing I’ve ever tasted.”
Ana stepped in front of him, handing the boy his gun. “When one of any clan is murdered for with no reason, there is an imbalance, and the coffee is tainted. We must restore the balance before this gets out of hand,” she surprised me by speaking, with a tinge of an Aussie accent. The girl side-eyed me before shooting Jude a knowing look. “Don’t let her get in our way.”
“Aye, aye, captain.” He mocked a salute before nodding to me. “All right! Sim, you grab a sample. We’ll go find the altar.”
Something ice-cold slipped down my spine.
“What?”
“Cool it. It’s more fun than it sounds,” was all Jude responded with. “Grab the samples.”
I was running on adrenaline, doing exactly what he said. I grabbed two coffee cups. “What do we do now? We go home, right?”
He swiped at his lips with a sound of disgust. “Are you kidding? No, man. We get coffee which ain’t tainted.”
Ana took out two guards in the back before leading us both through a heavy metal door that led into tunnels, tunnels, illuminated by candlelight. “You just killed multiple people,” I finally managed to choke out, following the two of them deeper into the dark. “Over coffee.” I couldn’t resist a nervous laugh that spluttered into a cry. “You just murdered seven baristas over fucking coffee!” I found myself backing away at points, scanning for a way out, an exit away from this fucking nightmare.
Jude turned to me, the glitter in his eyes reflected in the candlelight. “Oh, please,” His voice echoed down the tunnel in a chuckle. “Do you really think this is just about coffee?”
I didn't understand what he meant until we came to the end of the tunnel, which dipped into an alcove leading us into a large cave-like room. Drawing his gun, Jude scanned the dark. "Anyone in here?" He said, and Ana hit him. Silence answered, and I found myself paralyzed to the spot. I didn't know what to stare at first. The ten-foot-tall Starbucks Siren looming over us, illuminated in flickering orange candlelight, or the old swimming pool filled to the brim. When I took a step forward, my foot sunk into something soft, and I made the mistake of looking down. Bodies.
I guessed that was "The Drink".
I felt myself fall back, but Ana's warm arms were guiding me away from decomposing flesh which decapitated heads poisoned in a way that I could almost call ritualistic. There were bodies everywhere, all of them curled up or had died in a position of prayer. Jude crouched in front of a guy still in his Starbucks apron. His eyes had been cleanly plucked from his skull. Jude's expression was beautifully sombre in the candlelight. "Fuck, dude," he whispered.
"Looks like they got you."
“Which explains how they got their hands on our recipe.” Ana pulled out her gun and clicked off the safety. The girl’s eyes were suddenly sad, her lip wobbling. I had a hard time believing a girl who had taken out three baristas at point-blank range was crying.
"Through him."
“What is this place?” I whispered. "What the fuck are you doing in here?”
Jude straightened up. Ana moved behind him, and I noticed her hands holding her gun were trembling. She raised her arm, pointing it at the back of his head. Jude didn't retaliate, only sending me a sickly smile. "It used to be ours," he said. "Until other stores started opening, and it became a fucking free-for-all." Jude sighed, rocking back and forth on his heel. Ana's trigger finger followed his movements. "We have a peace treaty..." Jude trailed off. "Sorry. HAD a peace treaty." He nodded to his colleague. "Second Street has always been obsessed with this particular blend we have that other stores don't." His lips curved. "They're greedy, and thought they could fuck with us. First, they took our last manager. He was like a dad to us. Sliced him up and sent us his head." He gestured to his friend. "And then they took Ren. They brought this shit upon themselves."
As he spoke, Jude dropped to his knees and closed his eyes, bowing his head in front of the Siren. Ana didn't move. "Are you ready?"
“Always.”
I screamed, slamming my hand over my mouth when this time when Ana shot Jude point blank in the back of the head. When his body crumpled to the ground, something inside me snapped in two, and I couldn’t breathe suddenly. I thought the two were playing some kind of sick game before I caught unmistakable seeping black pooling across the alter.
In the blur of orange candlelight, it was almost a mesmerizing sight. “Shush!” Ana sent me an annoyed look, before gathering his body in her arm. “Make yourself useful and grab a bucket,” she said, stumbling towards the pool. I watched her, my heart diving into my throat. When I didn’t move, Ana hissed out and twisted around.
“Did you not hear me?!” she yelled. “Get a bucket and start collecting it!” The girl gestured towards a large, rusted pipe looming over the pool, a stream of murky brown water leaking into the pool. When I started forwards, the girl shook her head. “Not yet.” She said, before heaving Jude’s body and throwing him into the darkness. I heard the splash, but I didn’t even see his body hit the surface. Part of me wanted to demand what the fuck she was doing, but I did what I was told, with trembling hands, grabbing a bucket and shuffling over to the pool edge. Ana hissed out again. “I said not yet!” Before I could speak, she held a finger to her lips. “Do it now!”
“The pool water?!” I shrieked.
She raised a brow. “You think that’s water?”
Before I could coerce some kind of speech, I was interrupted by what felt like a sudden earthquake. The ground rumbled under our feet, and I hesitated before dropping the bucket into the water and scooping up as much as I could. I quickly realized it wasn’t water. It was thick with the constancy of blood, coffee brown and yet sticky and warm like blood.
Above us, the pipe seemed to come to life, a brand new stream of murky brown solution coming down in a waterfall. I didn’t think about the pieces of flesh floating on the surface, the decomposing heads I caught bobbing around, or the fact that I was dipping my hands in blood. Coffee and blood. My stomach was trying to projectile my lunch, but I swallowed it down. I took advantage, managing three buckets before Ana was grasping my shoulders and pulled me back. I didn’t realize I was sobbing until she was handing me a handkerchief, and I was staring at her and it, like, “What do you expect me to do with this?!”
Still in shock, I tried to get another bucket full before she dragged me from the pool edge. “You can stop now,” she said. “We have enough.”
"Enough what?!"
I staggered back when the surface of the pool rippled. I don’t know what I expected to come out.
Dead bodies?
Decapitated heads?
Not Jude, covered in the brown murky shit I had filled the buckets with. When he broke the surface, I almost threw one of the buckets at his head. Despite being covered in coffee and blood, his skin was oddly free of flaws. The guy was also really naked, which should have been a minor problem compared to what I was seeing, which was a real resurrection in front of a ten-foot statue of the Starbucks siren. Which was completely normal.
But I still found my cheeks heating up. Jude ran a hand through soaked curls sticking over his eyes, shaking them like a dog before pulling himself out. I couldn’t help noticing there was no gunshot wound. It was almost as if his body was completely new. I took in abnormally grey-looking skin, like dead flesh, before averting my gaze. “Did we do it?” He gasped out, immediately covering himself. Once out of the pool, he knelt on the ground, sucking in breaths of air before seemingly realizing the state of himself.
“Fuck. I didn’t think this through.”
“I did.” Ana reached into the backpack she had brought, pulling out a shirt and jeans, reverting her eyes, and throwing him the bundle. “Get dressed.” She said, But there was a slight smirk on her lips. “Yes. I think we managed to appease them.”
“Sweet!” Jude grinned, dressing quickly. He sucked the tips of his fingers. “Mmm.” He nodded at Ana. “That tastes a lot better.”
He gestured to her, and to my disgust, the girl delicately licked his fingers and nodded with her own smile. “It tastes like cherry blossom.”
His eyes fell on me, and I saw that inhuman gleam in his eye—that had been very much there before he was resurrected in a pool of coffee. His lip quirked. I could still see coffee-- or blood dripping in thick rivulets down his temples and cheek. “Should we?”
Jude turned to Ana. “I mean while we’re here, right? We can induct the newbie.”
Immediately, I knew what he was talking about. I stepped back, but he was following me, getting closer and closer until his breath was in my face, and I was teetering on the edge. I sensed something in his eyes, something I never expected from a man who knew exactly what he was doing. Envy. Another step, and I would be falling into what I was sure was a pool full of decomposing bodies and resurrecting coffee. “Not now,” Ana murmured, and Jude snapped out of it, taking a step back.
“Buzzkill.” He muttered.
But he did step away, allowing me to inch away from the pool.
“Later,” Ana said. “She’s shaken up. We can do it first thing tomorrow.”
To my surprise, there were no cops at the scene at Second Street. Because there was no scene.
The store was back to normal, and I didn’t have the energy to question why. When we returned, Aurora wrapped me into a hug I tried to get out of as quickly as possible, eager to get the fuck away from that place. But. I had to finish my shift. I had watched a man resurrected by coffee in a fucking Starbucks shrine, and yet somehow I had to keep making drinks until my shift ended. It was nearing closing time when the doors opened, and I found myself face-to-face with the girl from earlier. The one wearing the pink ray-bans.
She didn’t say anything, but the blade of her knife grazing my gut told me everything I needed to know. With a knowing look when she slipped off her raybans, she pressed something into my hand before leaving, and I handed it to the manager, who opened it up, almost died laughing, and then threw it in the trash.
“You work for psychopaths.” I managed to get out, sidling in front of Jude while he was clocking out.
“Also, didn’t you… didn’t you fucking die?”
Jude didn’t look up from his phone. “It’s complicated.” His lip quirked. “You’ll find out tomorrow during your induction.”
“But… you work for these people!” I lowered my voice. “And you’re not trying to get away?” I gestured to Kai and Aurora standing by the door, the two of them locked in conversation. “None of you?”
Jude frowned, and I caught the first hint of annoyance. I had only seen this guy smiling, so seeing him scowling was quite the change. “I’m sorry, do you… do you think I have a choice?”
He surprised me with a laugh. “Me? A choice? You really think I wake up every morning and WANT to do this shit?” He got close, his breath in my ear. “You came here willingly. I didn’t. In fact? I don’t even remember coming here. My interview, my first day? Nothing. I don’t even remember my time at Second Street.” He threw a towel at me before I could coerce words. “Finish clearing up, all right? I’ll see you tomorrow for induction.”
There was something cruel in his smile like he was waiting for whatever my induction had in store for me.
I couldn’t help myself. When everyone was gone, and I was tasked with locking up, I picked the discarded note out of the trash, smoothing it down.
“You pieces of shit just declared war. Sleep with one eye open! 😊”
Cora xx.”
….
I cut my finger with a knife this morning. When I sucked it and grabbed a band-aid, I tasted coffee. I went home and threw up coffee.
I am peeing coffee.
I showered 8 times and I still fucking smell of coffee.
I don’t think I’m going to go to work tomorrow.
Edit: There’s been a break-in— and the manager wants me to come in early. Jude and Ana woke me up in the middle of the night to go over tactics. We are taking down Second Street during closing time.
I guess I am going to work tomorrow.
Does anyone know how to use a gun?

Company Name	Title	City
Best Service Heating & Cooling	Part-time Customer Service Rep	Whitehall
Best Service Heating & Cooling	HVAC Technician	Whitehall
American Family Insurance	Senior Security Consultant	Akron
Ohio University	Assistant Director, Access and Inclusion and Senior Assistant Director, Access and Inclusion	Athens
Ohio University	Director of Diversity Affairs	Athens
Ohio University	Director of Diversity Equity & Inclusion	Athens
Beckett Springs	Outpatient Registered Nurse	Camp Dennison
VineBrook Homes, LLC	Director, Accounts Payable & Utilities	Catawba
Clean Harbors	Cleanpack Chemist	Cleveland
Beckett Springs	Registered Nurse (RN)	Cleves
Zipline Logistics LLC	Operations Associate	Columbus
Green Bay Packaging, Inc.	Maintenance Technician - Electrical	Cuba
VineBrook Homes, LLC	Director, Accounts Payable & Utilities	Dayton
Kettering Health Network	CMA	Dayton
ProMedica	LPN	Defiance
ProMedica	Licensed Practical Nurse (LPN)	Defiance
Quantum Health	Digital Accessibility Lead	Dublin
VineBrook Homes, LLC	Director, Accounts Payable & Utilities	Englewood
ProMedica	Registered Nurse (RN)	Fostoria
ProMedica	RN	Fostoria
Valley View Healthcare Center	Scheduling Coordinator - RN/LPN/STNA	Fremont
L3Harris Technologies	Specialist, Quality Engineering	Goshen
Beckett Springs	Registered Nurse (RN)	Harrison
L3Harris Technologies	Specialist, Quality Engineering	Harrison
Beckett Springs	Outpatient Registered Nurse	Harrison

Hey guys, here are some recent job openings in oh. Feel free to comment here or send me a private message if you have any questions, I'm at the community's disposal! If you encounter any problems with any of these job openings please let me know that I will modify the table accordingly. Thanks!

On Tuesday after three weeks sober I relapsed. I didn't stop drinking until 5am this morning from Tuesday and I only stopped because I physically couldn't put another drink inside me because I was projectile vomiting dark blood. I rang an ambulance who took me to hospital, they gave me morphine through an IV, anti sickness drugs and a dose of libirum. They discharged me a few hours ago and I'm now at home absolutely heartbroken demoralised and frightened. Yesterday was my nanas funeral and I didn't turn up. My whole family are done with me now. I'm alone, scared and just want a hug from my mum. I just want someone to hold me and tell me that it'll be OK. I'm so broken. I've lost everything and I can't bare the pain and shame. I just want my mum. I want this pain to end.

I have been unable to stop thinking about these two cases ever since I saw this post and its comments suggesting a possible link between the two.
Cuyahoga County/Garfield Heights John Doe:
https://www.namus.gov/UnidentifiedPersons/Case#/1878
https://www.doenetwork.org/cases/1117umoh.html
https://unidentified-awareness.fandom.com/wiki/Cuyahoga_County_John_Doe_(1991))
Sex: Male
Race: Black/African American
Estimated Age: Adult/pre-20/18-21
Estimated Year of Death: 1991
Estimated Height: 5'7"
Physical Description: Black curly hair
Clothing (all on body): red short sleeved t-shirt, Levi jeans 34Wx30L, tan boxers, 2 pairs of white socks, white Nike shoes with purple and green stripes.
His body was found by children on September 11th, 1991, in a wooded area at the rear of 4954 East 81st Street (Garfield Heights, Ohio). In his shoe was a note which said:
"For Daddy
We can't wait to see you!
Love
Cynthia and Boo Boo
Miss You"
Again, somebody in the comments of this post found two women using the names Cynthia and Boo Boo (Alice) through the signing of this obituary. These women have Facebook profiles but in reading the comments of the reddit post, they responded strangely when they were contacted about this a few years ago; I haven't contacted them myself and I suggest other people don't either. I think that there is a chance that these sisters from Ohio wrote the note and that they are potentially the children of this man but their responses suggest that they don't want to be contacted for whatever reason and that should be respected.
My thoughts about this case alone:

• I lean towards Cynthia and Boo Boo being sisters but there's also a good chance that one of them was the John Doe's girlfriend/wife/mother of the child, or that Boo Boo was a pet
• The note is written in neat handwriting which appears to be that of either an older child or an adult writing on the behalf of a child (or children). I'm unsure whether the "For Daddy" and "Miss You" look printed or are just very carefully drawn and coloured in?
• The two pairs of socks might suggest that he was homeless, and I think the fact that he stored the note in his shoe contributes to this as well - if it was a cherished possession, it was safer from wind/rain in his shoe than in his pocket

James Eric Bess:
https://charleyproject.org/case/james-eric-bess
James Eric Bess and his friend Chipley Charles Sanders went missing from a boys' group home in Ashland, Kentucky on October 4th 1984. James was 14 years old when he went missing (born 12/18/1969), which would make him 21 in 1991.
Last Seen Wearing: blue denim jacket, sports shirt, grey sneakers, blue jeans
Description: African-American male with black hair and blue/grey eyes. 5'6" and 110 pounds. Scarring on the right side of his waist, his right hand, and his right elbow.
Also, one website lists his first name as Eric - not sure if this is accurate considering all others list him as James Eric but should be noted: http://www.missingin.org/reg9449/eric_james_bess.htm
There isn't an overwhelming amount of evidence to suggest that the two are linked but the timelines and physical characteristics add up. Garfield Heights is 4-5 hours from Ashland so it doesn't seem beyond the realm of possibility that James (and maybe Chipley) could have hitchhiked. The thing that really made me consider the link is that James' sister is in the comments of the Unresolved Mysteries post (Chipley's is too), and she believes that there is a resemblance between Alice's grandchild and the Bess family - although again there is no confirmation that those women are related to the Garfield County John Doe. But, in the comments she also mentions that before James was sent to the home, it was believed that he had a baby on the way. Could this not be Cynthia or Boo Boo?
I believe that this has all been submitted to the relevant people but I think I will do it again, if only to rule out the possibility. I haven't been able to find anything that wasn't already established in the comments of the Unresolved Mysteries post, but I thought it was worth seeing what people in this subreddit thought about it. This is my first time making a post like this and I'm not very active in this subreddit so apologies if this is confusing or lacks info, I did my best. Also, just to reiterate, please don't contact anybody - I haven't either
edited to fix links

Scenes that were emotionally resonant without being the main focus or always highlighted.
Season 1: Tractor thanking Emma for being a good influence on Sean Season 2: JT fighting Dean after she shared with him Season 3: Sean confessing that he stole Snake’s computer and offering to fix the car Season 4: JT going to Rick’s funeral and making up with Toby Season 5: Jimmy & Spinner making up Season 6: Liberty agreeing to play Mia’s video during the funeral Season 7: Jimmy getting Spinner to go have surgery when he has cancer instead of fighting Season 8: Spinner’s pep talk to Holly J after she’s kicked off Power Squad Season 9: Johnny confessing his feelings for Jenna when she tried to seduce him Season 10: KC’s Mom defending him from Simpson and telling him he doesn’t have to go home with her Season 11: KC & Jenna giving up Ty season 12: Zig & Tori making up after he dines and dashes Season 13: Zig & Zoe talking on the bus Season 14: Tiny telling Zig they did the right thing after he snitches on Vince NC 1: Grace & Zoe talking about her illness NC 2: Hunter apologizing to Yael NC 3: Esme & Zig making up and sharing about her Mom NC 4: Winston & Goldi making up

If you had an obituary published for a loved one in a local newspaper and people from work found out about it and showed up at funeral services/sent condolence gifts to pay their respects. But you didn’t tell a single person about your relative’s passing or any details about the service. On one hand it’s public information due to being in the paper, but on the other hand if you wanted people from work knowing about It you would have told them.

Hi, I just need help editing a video. My mom's only sister died suddenly on Monday; my mom is on her first overseas trip with my dad in Italy for 2 weeks. It's been the WORST week ever. I managed to get a zoom video of the service. I have a work laptop and can't download software. The video clip is longer than an hour and larger than most online editing software maximum sizes. It just needs the first 13 minutes to be taken off.
The funeral service starts at 13:05 to the end of the clip. Willing to toss in $5 via venmo, as it probably won't take more than a couple minutes for someone who has the editing software.
Edit: thanks guys! It's done. If you DM or chatted me I'll respond when I'm home.

I have a feeling I know what people will tell me and that I wont like what they have to say but I need at the very least to write this out and express my feelings.
So I've had trauma and depression since childhood and in my 20's I abused alcohol and drugs [mostly psychedelics' and some xanax], I had horrible depression. At times I couldnt really see colour or taste food, at times my drinking was so bad I barely ate. Very unstable. Frankly the only reason I didnt end up homeless or dead was that I happened to know other traumatized alcoholics and drug addicts and we co dependently saw eachother through the hard times. My best friend in that particular category overdosed just after the pandemic and that was that. I have poor relations with my family [I do talk to one sister] and only a couple friends left. Those friends are actually pretty stable, though one has kind of a drinking problem as I do.
I went into a pre apprentice trades program as part of Welfare; most of the participants are ex criminals or addicts. I met a girl. She was extroverted, wild, friendly, still using too much coke and things like that but on anti depressants, resolute to raise her son and get him back, stay away from criminals and stay away from the drug trade. For someone whos only ambition was to sleep as much as I could for as long as I could, the fact that she wants a red seal for carpentry and wants to open up a shelter for abused children really impressed me, it made me admire her even. We both had similar backgrounds in that respect only she had a far worse life and still wanted and wants a normal one. Maybe im just desperate and lonely but it really hit me to meet someone I liked who I understood who impressed me.
Anyway; during the program we gradually became friends. Not the best of friends, just friends. And she would flirt with me some as well-- as I said a wild girl so its hard to interpret the flirting, and she said she wanted no man just to raise her son. most of her friends are guys. She wanted to hang out and do shrooms but I was busy, so I invited her over a while later and she accepted. But she got depressed on the weekend and never came down; we continued to hang out but she flirted noticably less. Honestly her friend had just died and a lot of other friends in jail and to be frank I was probably being a self absorbed asshole even to invite her down, but I was excited to see her. About a week ago she got full custody of her kid back and is therefore very busy and mentioned it.
After that the program went online mostly, and she skipped a few days for the funeral and drinking, things like that. I ran into her again on the last day and as we had done previously we hung out with eachother most of the day. We ate lunch (where to give an indication of the relationship in some way; were close enough that while waiting for the food she rested her head on my shoulder and I wrapped my arm around her] grabbed some booze and drank for a couple hours. I asked her if she ever wanted to hang out after the program and she paused for a second to think and then answered: "sure, we both live in the same city unlike those other wackos, we can hang out. but id probably have to bring my son along" Not a word for word accurate quote but its close enough. So right there I, in all honesty from a point of self consciousness, am not sure how to take that. Hesitating because she didnt want to? hesitating because she was thinking out the structure of her life? my impression of her is always that shes fond of me and a very open person, but I make bad decisions and calls. So to my ear saying 'my son might be there' is an honest concession to the fact that shes a single mom and in a sense the willingness to hang out with me and her son is a good sign, yes? But I cant get it out of my head its a bad one.
This is where I am quite embarrassed: The last time we drank together this girl got way too drunk and ended up pissing in some water cups and throwing them out the window of the bus. She didnt get in trouble cause she was further to the back, it all worked out. Yesterday on said bus though I was the one who was way too drunk [and a bit high on coke] and so I pissed into a water bottle-- which I slightly overfilled because it was hard to judge and a bit of piss was on the cap, which I then tightened and threw out the window lol. Ofc the bus driver noticed because im a dumb fuck, and kicked me and the girl off the bus -- at least I think thats what happened, I know we both left but in all honesty my memory is sketchy and I wasnt paying attention.
Long story short im pretty sure I heard the girl say something like 'you got some piss on me' holy fuck my soul shattered into a million pieces. Again as a preface; she seems non judgmental and is more than a little crazy-- drugs, things like that. She burned her arm with cigarettes the other day just as a dare to see who could withstand more pain between her and her friend. So I honestly have NO idea how something like that would be received. A regular person absolutely would call me fucking pathetic [trust me...I know im pathetic] and would want nothing to do with me after that. Maybe shes different?
On the way back home stumbling drunk I texted her 'your cool, text me if you ever wanna hang out' and no reply. Again she just got her kid back and has been saying shes too busy to text people-- she even had an argument with someone who thought he was being ghosted.
Honestly what the fuck do I do:
-I cant stop going over this in my head and tearing myself apart. I really liked her and I feel like I shot myself in the foot to the point where I cant salvage it. The programs over and im honestly not even sure how I can communicate with her. Should I apologize? Do I call her up? Should I wait a few days?
-I am if im being completely honest interested in dating her--- but I dont want to be, because she said she just wanted friends, and I do want to be her friend, and I dont want to be that fucking dishonest simp asshole whos resenting her and sitting on the sidelines. I want the crush to go away because she seems like someone I could be best friends with
-I am also aware that line of reasoning sounds precariously like I love her or something, and im not sure if the feelings will go away
-I'm also just not sure if shes good for me or im good for her. I know that since ive met her ive enjoyed waking up and most of my instincts and things I do are shared with her, and I always have felt like a wild fucking loser who no one understood
-All ive done today is walk around trying to distract myself from this.
-Assuming she isnt mad at me and im just neurotic and mentally ill [definitely]; then how or what should I do in going about hanging out with her? I've never been an adult before, only a drunken loser and a petty thief. Is the subtext of hanging out with a woman and her kid that its a date? Should I just ask a generic thing like 'do you wanna drink and hang out?'
Or maybe im just barking up the wrong tree and shes not even very interested me as a friend, I donno.

Lisa hummed quietly while she worked in her kitchen, maybe it was William’s influence, or maybe Rebecca’s, but she still liked making coffee the old fashioned way. Not that any of them minded using preground beans, but no technology has replaced the power of freshness.
So while I sat waiting for her to return, I simply watched what was already on her screen. It was an animated drama of some sort, maybe horror, there was a demon weeping over a grave at least, could have been anything, really.
And I just listened while she hummed along with the coffee grinder, those things have changed a lot over the years, now they were near totally silent, I saw one in an Earth museum once that made a tremendous racket, but these had only the faintest hum as the beans were reduced to powder.
I didn’t know the tune Lisa was humming, but it felt strange to hear her let out a little tune after I told her I was leaving, and of course I couldn’t know if I’d be coming back.
She and I [Redacted], and we really did like each other, a lot, actually. Of course we both knew it couldn’t last forever, we were quite literally from different worlds, and we wanted different things out of our lives.
But that didn’t mean we couldn’t have something good for a time. I had to wonder if she was thinking about this as the time to let go? Humans have a habit of putting a brave face on things, they have a whole philosophy called ‘stoicism’ which is basically just putting a show of strength on while enduring a lot of unpleasant shit.
I can’t say I liked that philosophy very much, it reminded me too much of my homeworld’s view of things. I suppose it had a valid point when it came to hard times, but it seemed too much to like hard times. At least as I understood it, perhaps I was wrong in that regard. I’m sure the subject will be hotly debated over for years.
Regardless, at that moment I was just enjoying the noise of her preparations, watching out of the corner of my eye while she brewed coffee the old fashioned way. I pause for a moment here to tell you, in addition to the supply of alcohol that went to Dlamias, at my suggestion, Bonny Red also dropped a large supply of coffee off at the neutral trading station where she had to deliver her goods. Along with directions for how to prepare it.
Now, in the capital of Dlamias, I knew for a fact that a small number of ‘coffee bars’ were starting to open up. The stay awake juice was used by a number of government employees to help keep them focused, and… well, in the Earth middle ages coffee was banned in an empire because people stayed up late talking politics while drinking the stuff. Coffee shops became hotbeds of political dissent.
It was one more little monkey wrench I’d thrown into the gears of Dlamisan society. Awake for longer and with time to talk, I had absolutely no doubt that the buried frustrations of my people would start to bubble up as surely as the water was boiling in Lisa’s pot right now.
I know my government, they’ll use the stuff to extend labor hours and keep people working harder, and they’ll put it together with food for convenience…
And my infection will spread. Longer hours, but also time to complain, and with the first humans settling in too…
The dam would burst and change would be forced. I did wonder if they would try to use military force to quell dissent. But I doubted it, especially now. In a way, this danger with the return of the Rogue World and the disappearances and the threats from the Praeda, couldn’t have come at a better time.
Concessions would be the government’s only option, and once that began, there would be no stopping it.
‘Even if I die out there, my will, will be done no matter what.’ I thought, and made the evil finger pyramid of doom with my hands.
Lisa returned a moment later with coffee in hand and a smile on her face. She sat beside me on the couch and asked, “Did you enjoy the show?”
I hadn’t really paid much attention to it, but it seemed alright. “I haven’t seen that much, but… it looks alright.”
“It’s based on an old novel, that demon,” she pointed to the ashen figure, “lost his wife to human invaders, his village, everything but his daughter. This season is based on one of the sequels in that series, he’s finally reclaimed the land where there village was, and he found her body still buried in the rubble of their home. So he had her buried there and all the grief hit him at once, everything he kept buried while he worked to raise their daughter.”
“Oh… so humans are the villains in this one?” I asked.
“Sort of.” She said as she leaned back and slipped her arm over my shoulder from behind while she drank from her glass cup. “Like, the humans started it, they built the first cities and needed labor so they started conquering nomads and villages to work their farms and whatnot. So that’s bad, but not all humans are the bad guys. Some demons are shown as bad, same for some of the elves and dwarves… I guess you could say that their ‘governments’ do bad things to each other.”
“Oh, so everybody is kind of bad sometimes?” I asked.
“Yeah, kinda.” She sipped, “A lot of gray there, most of what happens that’s bad after a certain point, happens because everybody is too afraid to stop. They don’t want to keep fighting, but they’re afraid of what happens if they pull back.”
“That’s interesting.” I said as I brought the cup to my mouth. It was hot, rich, fragrant, the rich steam rose from within and I inhaled it with the vigor of somebody bursting from beneath the water after nearly drowning and finding air again.
I made a mental note to bring some of this with me when it was time to leave, Lisa was quiet, seemingly waiting for me to explain. A lot would be necessarily classified and, reckless as I may be, I knew better than to let things like this slip.
“I’m going on a peace mission, actually, not just me. The whole family is. It’s… complicated, but Bonny Red is taking us to a neutral zone where we can talk to the Praeda, all of them, or most, at least.” I shifted a little in my seat, I didn’t want to tell her how dangerous it might be for us, but I hated keeping secrets.
“Do you know when you’ll be back?” She asked, her wide eyes fluttered a little, “Is this one of those ‘gone for decades and I’ll be an old lady by the time you get back’ talks?”
I snorted my coffee just a little and smacked my chest a few times. “No… I mean I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, but it will take months just to get there, it’s over thirty-thousand lightyears away, so even at the fastest possible speed through thick space, we’re looking at nine months travel without doing any jumps.”
She whistled long and low, “So… what you’re saying is, I’ll need to pack my toothbrush, and a pair of replacement heads for it?” She asked.
“Say what now?” I asked and my ears twitched.
She turned to the side and propped her head up in her hand, then gave me a quirky smile and said, “You’ve got all those ears and still didn’t listen to me? Alien or not, you’re definitely male.” She laughed at her own joke while I could only cock my head in confusion.
“Say what now?” I asked again.
“I want to go too.” She clarified, “Listen, Bonny Red and I have had a nice arrangement going for a while now, but alien or not, I know that woman and she’s definitely planning on spending a lot of time on Earth after all this, she’s been in the void for a few years now and I know how sailors, pirates or not, get when they finally hit a safe port. The easiest thing for all of us is if I just go along. Besides,” she held up her arm and waved one hand around her room, “I don’t really have anything holding me back. I have my degree, my job won’t go anywhere, I can sublet my apartment. And how many people get a chance to go out that far?” She asked.
“Wait, you’re serious?” I asked. I definitely wanted to know what she was talking about when it came to Bonny Red, but the more pressing matter was her thought of coming with us.
“I don’t have to be part of your envoy, I’ll just join her crew for a year or so. I’m no stranger to hard work or military stuff, you know that.” She said.
“Well, I mean, that’s up to Bonny Red, not me… but… why would you…” She stopped me by putting a hand on my chest.
“Because you and I both know this can’t last. You’ll live for hundreds of years, your stages of life are in line with mine right now, but that’s going to change. I’ll grow older, faster, maybe I’ll want to start a family of my own, something we can’t do, but even if I don’t do that, time changes all humans, faster than you know. You saw how Fauve has grown up, right?” She asked.
I could only nod. She was in her twenties now and while there were echoes of the child I knew, she was like a tree that I’d watched grow from a sapling. I could still recognize her for what she’d been, but she was not the same.
“That’s how it will be for me from my twenties to my thirties, and thirties to forties. I’m going to change, I won’t be the twenty-something who gets hammered with her friends on weekends anymore, but you’ll still be the you that you are right now, when I’m old, gray, and thinking ahead for my funeral.” She chuckled, “From my perspective, you’re kind of like if Peter Pan was a college student and not a young boy.”
I only vaguely knew the story, but I got the gist of what she meant, I just didn’t know what to say to it.
“To you, nine months, two years, three years, those may not sound like a lot. To me, they’re big bites out of my life, and when we’re done, those days won’t come back. So, if you don’t object…” For a moment she looked quite vulnerable, like she thought I very well might refuse her, inching herself away a little but leaving her hand where it was over where my hearts were beating faster by the moment.
“I’d want to go with you. If I can. If I can’t… then I have to be honest, that’s too much of my life to slip by to wait on something that can’t really last anyway.”
She wasn’t wrong. I did my very best to never think about the differences in our lifespans, but clearly that wasn’t something too far from her mind. “It’s not really up to me, but… if she refuses to let you sign on…” I didn’t want to finish that sentence.
“Right. I think she will. She understands a lot about things not lasting.” Lisa smirked a little, “I will have to figure out what to do with my hair on this trip though, there aren’t exactly seasons in space.” She ran her free hand through the long strands, and I suggested… “You could have it done like stars, put the night sky design on there instead of the season?” I suggested, and realized that in saying that, I more or less acknowledged that I wanted her to go along. I knew she was right, this might very well be the last of our times together, she was in her mid to late twenties now, I think. Twenty-five or twenty-six, even if we got out there and stayed for one day and came back, eighteen Earth months would have come and gone, and that’s if we stopped for nothing. In reality we could be gone for a full two years with ease.
“You’re a genius, Bailey.” She said and set her cup down with a smirk, “I’ll make sure to pick up enough dye for the trip, and I’ll send an ‘application’ to Bonny Red before she gets here.”
Humans do not move slowly, that much is for sure. As far as she was concerned, the matter was settled.
I wasn’t sure if Bonny Red would be alright with this, but she was frankly as strange as Lisa. For some reason, unbeknownst and inexplicable to me, I always end up surrounded by oddballs and outliers.
And you know what?
I wouldn’t have it any other way.